Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.

Approaching Mother’s Day


Marsh marigold glow

Marsh marigold glow

Earlier this week the grocery store cashier offered me a coupon for wiring flowers to my mother.  The offer shocked me, not because I’m adverse to discounts, but because I hadn’t realized Mother’s Day was coming up.  And because of course no florist will wire flowers to heaven.  I absently refused the coupon offer and walked out to the car with my groceries, thinking about flowers and Mom and the festive day coming up.

Most years of late I’ve been successful at blocking Mother’s Day out, ignoring the advertisements and the rows and rows of cards with pink envelopes.   I can be genuinely happy for coworkers excitedly  talking of brunches and gifts.  Progress.

This year I recognize even more progress as I think without pain of the flowers we used to give my Mom for Mother’s Day.  Every year we (or she, I don’t remember) picked out flats of petunias and called them our Mother’s Day gift to her.

And I remember other flowers too, the springs we dug up marsh marigolds from the swamp over in the woods and lugged them home in buckets to be planted along the lake shore at home.  I don’t really know if she wanted marsh marigolds, or us covered in mud for that matter, but she always seemed happy to see them.

And then this morning I heard a radio commercial for chocolate covered strawberries that had to be ordered by tonight in order for delivery to Mom before Sunday.  It was a long ad, filled with descriptions of juicy strawberries dipped in dark chocolate and sprinkled with nuts.

The commercial made the strawberries sound good, but it mostly reminded me of my Mom standing in the middle of a strawberry patch, and the way that first warm, ripe strawberry tasted right from the field.  All the dark chocolate and nuts in the world will never make that advertised strawberry taste as good as the ones we ate under the hot summer sun with Mom all those years ago.

So as we approach this Mother’s Day I think of Mom, and how happy she was with petunias and marsh marigolds and strawberries warmed in the sun.   I bet most mothers are the same.  Show up with a handful of dandelions and they’d be happy.

To all the mothers out there, Happy Mother’s Day.  And to those of you with mothers still on this earth take a moment and thank them.  A flat of petunias might be just the thing.

Miss you Mom.

Mom 1974



Author: dawnkinster

I'm a long time banker having worked in banks since the age of 17. I took a break when I turned 50 and went back to school. I graduated right when the economy took a turn for the worst and after a year of library work found myself unemployed. I was lucky that my previous bank employer wanted me back. So here I am again, a long time banker. Change is hard.

23 thoughts on “Approaching Mother’s Day

  1. Thank you, Dawn. I’ve been struggling with the Mother’s Day ads (and telling them to go away!), and you’ve turned things around a bit for me. Instead of thinking about how Mom isn’t here, it’s a good time to, well, just think about Mom and how she had the greenest thumb on the planet (I swear she could bring the dead back to life!). I’m going to plant a few flowers for her that I know she would love. And maybe she’ll send some of her energy down here to take care of them because I’m still a novice at this, and I’m pretty sure my sister got her green thumb so I could use a bit of help. After all, I’m infamous for killing off houseplants that are supposed to live with little care and attention.


    • I’m sorry she’s not here Robin, but glad you can plant some things she’d like. And you never know, a little of that green thumb might show up! Hugs.


  2. I’m not the biggest fan of Mother’s Day either. My strategy to get through it is to honor all the gals out there who don’t get the credit they deserve: the stepmoms, the aunts, the mentors. the ones who run horse or dog rescues…the mom who has a girl called Katie.


  3. For me, Mother’s Day is a day for being grateful that my “kids” are the people they are. My mother has been gone for several years and we lived many miles apart for several years before that.


  4. Being a great mom to a fur baby is the same as child. Happy Mother’s day to you!

    There is another section of the population who have had mother’s who didn’t respond to their abuse, who also don’t feel inclined to celebrate Mom. For a few years, I wanted to avoid it. Now, I feel that I am grateful my mother showed me how it would end IF I did not change. I am grateful to be the mom I am today and I celebrate that by being so thankful I feel love inside for my children and being able to stand against what I needed to in order to be the mother my mother couldn’t be.

    Now, everyday is mother’s day for me.


  5. I’ve been reminding all my students about the upcoming holiday, because I know most of their moms, and they’re fantastic women. I was thinking about bringing in a bunch of blank cards tomorrow, so the kids could write a little note to their mom. I know I’m going to get some eye rolls, but I hope they write a card. You just never know when your last chance to say ‘I love you’ will be.


  6. When my Mom died I was stroking her face softly and singing “oh would like to swing on a star – carry moon beams home in a jar” to her. You can send flowers to heaven – I tie a flower to a balloon every year and send it skywards and I know she smiles at that.


  7. Dawn, this is such a lovely post — thank you for saying it so well! Mom’s Day conflicts me, too, for reasons just like what you’ve written. Your mom lives on in your memory — perhaps Katie can help you plant a flat of petunias somewhere special?!


  8. Mommy was gonna just buy marigolds butt maybe she will buy petunias too. Will have to see what flowers they got at the market.


  9. What could be better than marsh marigolds and strawberries? Okay, petunias, too. Big hugs, Dawn, for your continuing lovely tributes to both your parents.


  10. **I hadn’t realized Mother’s Day was coming up. And because of course no florist will wire flowers to heaven**

    OOO, that sentence.

    Thinking of you, dear.

    The photo is lovely. xxxx


  11. I’m glad that this Mother’s Day brought you some happy memories. I’m lucky to have both a great mother and mother-in-law in my life, and this year it seems apparent how lucky I am. Several of my former students have lost their mothers (in middle school and high school), and I felt their pain this year as they mourned over the weekend. I love the thought of appreciating our mothers, but I really despise the commercialization 😦 It makes the unfairness of the world worse somehow. But enough of that, I am so happy to hear the good stories like yours 🙂 Hope the weekend was great!


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