I’m sitting this afternoon on my beautiful deck, reading email, investigating retirement communities, checking favorite blogs. I’m also digesting the latest news about the financial mess, the potential bailout, fears of losing retirement opportunities, craziness here in the US and everywhere else. It’s a wonderful thing having wireless, access to the world from a comfortable chair. But the news is not good from anywhere. Ah yes, there is the news that GM will build a small plant in Flint Michigan. That’s good news for a town that has been depressed for several decades. And the weather is still good. So there are two positive stories. But the overwhelming feeling I get is that I want to curl up in a small, warm, safe spot and wait it out. Preferably with my head in the sand. Maybe in warm beach sand on a far away island.

Not having a job has exacerbated my fearful feelings. I am beginning to believe that I need to make the smallest possible financial footprint right now. Similar to making a small carbon footprint in an effort to cause no harm to the environment, I feel like I need to hole up and not spend anything at all. Not drive the car. Not shop for groceries. Certainly not purchase anything remotely frivolous. Like books. Or underwear. Dog food is on the potentially frivolous list, but don’t tell Katie.

I know I am probably reacting foolishly, but I feel like I need to find a job now. Any job. That I need to work to replace the funds lost in the crazy market because I don’t have years to wait for the market to correct. My hairdresser (yes there is another frivolous expense that needs reconsideration) said that maybe I could get a job at Borders. Probably could. Good thing I went to school for all those advanced degrees.

Wait a minute; note to self. Remember that you LOVED going to school, and that in itself was reason enough to spend the money. In those days. Maybe not in these.