Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.

Bone structure

15 Comments

Many years ago having just graduated from college I couldn’t find work.  Wait a minute.  That sounds like my most recent college degree but no job experience…but I digress.  Back in the 70’s I was working through  a temporary agency and one of my assignments was to demonstrate the newly introduced Kodak Instant Camera which was directly competing with the more established Polaroid.

I was standing in the camera department of some big store, asking people if they wanted to have their pictures taken with the new camera.  Surprisingly many did.  They got to keep the photo and got a coupon for a discount off the camera.  Over the two or three days of the demo I began to notice that a lot of people look like each other.  That maybe there are only a handful of facial bone structures in existence.  That maybe we’re all more alike than we realize.

Now more than 30 years later I’m noticing this phenomenon again.  I see people that look familiar as I work at my new job back at the old bank.  People coming and going seem familiar, but I realize I’m not sure why.  Are they people I worked with four years ago?  Or do they just  remind me of people I knew while at school?  Or from my job at the library in between?  Or are they people I knew when I was a runner?  People in the bands I’ve played with?

I feel like I’ve had many separate lives over the years.  And sometimes I forget that people from my life at a bank in the Upper Peninsula don’t know my running friends from downstate, that the people I worked with at the mortgage company don’t know the library patrons I used to help, or the people that I’ve shared a music stand with.

It all seems like one seamless experience to me; though the life experiences have been pretty segregated I think that all the people I’ve met and known, talked to, commiserated with, all those people are pretty much the same.  Their faces are starting to run together as is my history of friends and acquaintances, all running together in a fluid stream of experience.

Lately when I see someone familiar approaching and smiling at me I smile back while racking my brain to figure out what part of my life they might have been in.  Where I knew them.  If I knew them.  Who they are.

Maybe it’s just that everyone looks alike and there’s only a handful of facial bone structures in the world.  Maybe we’re all more alike then we know.

Author: dawnkinster

I'm a long time banker having worked in banks since the age of 17. I took a break when I turned 50 and went back to school. I graduated right when the economy took a turn for the worst and after a year of library work found myself unemployed. I was lucky that my previous bank employer wanted me back. So here I am again, a long time banker. Change is hard.

15 thoughts on “Bone structure

  1. You have had some interesting jobs!

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  2. This reminds me of myself — searching the face of a grown up former student. They know me – and I can barely place them. I hate those moments!

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  3. That happens to me, but I’ve always just chalked it up to having a poor memory for faces. I might just have to start noticing bone structure so I can use that. LOL

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  4. I’ve had several conversations in the grocery store and home depot with a man I thought was my next door neighbor. Last time, Jeff was there and asked how I knew the guy, and why I was asking him so many questions about his new driveway. I said, “That’s our neighbor!”

    Jeff said, “Uh, sorry to tell you this, but he’s not our neighbor.”

    No wonder why he always looked at me like I was nuts when I said, “Hi neighbor!”

    I’m going to analzye both men’s bone structure….

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  5. Sara…he’s probably trying to figure out which neighbor YOU are, cause you seem so familiar…

    Jane, teachers probably have it the worst…all those kids growing up, changing, but the teacher stays pretty much the same…

    Marie, I chalk it it somewhat to a terrible memory myself.

    Diana, I HAVE had some pretty cool jobs!

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  6. This is an interesting post! First of all, I must say your job is interesting too as you can meet so many people no matter you remember them or not.
    I’ve problems of recognising and remembering people’s faces and names as I always mix up who and who and in the end, I’m the embarrassed one, LOL!
    It might be very interesting if we really go deep into studying the bone structures and I’m sure the findings will be really interesting.

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  7. This is something I am really noticing here in Arkansas – especially amongst the men, they all seem to have to same “look”. It’s not just that they wear the same sort of clothes but that bone structure and facial features. Everyone basically looks like they are closely related (which in many cases they are). I guess it isn’t really surprising that 50 years of living (for me that is) and the amount of faces I have seen during that time that people start looking familiar.

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  8. Not to freak you out, Dawn, but have you heard lately about “face blindness”? I’d never heard of it until Oliver Sacks came out and revealed that he has this condition. That’s the really good part, I think, because if someone as intelligent and productive and high-achieving as Oliver Sacks can deal with it, others with the condition can take heart. Here’s one link. There are many more, some of them included in this story:

    http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2010/12/15/eveningnews/main7153885.shtml

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  9. That happens to me a lot, …..and I hate feeling like I will hurt someones feelings not remembering who they are, and it is not because I did not care about them…..but then I have never been terrific at reccognizing people right away……but glad I am not the only one I just figure maybe my brain is full and has had to move some things to the back, LOL, or some cells are not so great now?? 😉

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  10. I’ve read about face blindness several times over the years, thinking that I must have a mild case. When I was married and my husband would leave for a week, I’d panic that I wouldn’t recognize him when he walked off the plane. Of course, I always recognized him with no problem, but my life has been filled with “which long-haired brunette female at the office was I talking to yesterday?” As I get older, I see more and more similar and almost-familiar faces, the same way that you do. My grandmother, who devolved into alzheimers, exhibited another variety of familiar-face syndrome: She lived in upstate new york her whole life. She stayed out here in california for a while, in the early stages of deterioration, and she was constantly identifying teenage girls as people with whom she went to school, or young adults as her neighbors or as teachers who worked with her husband (who retired in the 1950s, I believe) and so on. Hope I don’t go there!

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  11. OK you guys! Now stop it. Next thing you know I won’t recognize Katie! Wait…we were just looking at last year’s Sheltie calendar and there were two in there I thought looked JUST LIKE HER….OH NOOOOOOO!!!!!

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  12. Thanks for bring us back to our senses with a reality-checking laugh, Dawn.

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  13. Actually I had never heard of this before I read the article you linked me up with. Kind of frightening…

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  14. Maybe it’s just time to see the optometrist again!

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  15. I had to laugh when I read your comment about not recognizing Katie next. Years ago, my husband and I were at an agility trial with Zoe and I was looking through the photographers pics from that weekend, and I stopped on this one shot, and told my husband that I would love a shot like this of Zoe. It was Zoe! I felt the biggest idiot until the photographer started telling me stories of how sheltie people ordered pics of the wrong dog all the time. LOL Darn sable and white shelties, they all look alike! Just kidding.

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