We want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas! And to say thanks for all the kind comments so many of you have made over the years. You are all part of our blogger family and we hope each of you has a wonderful holiday with family and friends.
Enjoy a moment of peace, eat some good food, laugh at old jokes, remember good times. But most of all take this opportunity to slow down, look around, and recognize the moment. Today is special. Enjoy!
Yesterday was the 6th anniversary of Dad’s death. He was killed while driving to the airport, on the way north to visit family for Christmas. He was killed by a sleepy truck driver who didn’t notice that traffic had stopped. He was killed because some people put profit over safety.
I wasn’t going to blog about it. No one wants to read a sad blog two days before Christmas. We should be concentrating on package wrapping, grocery shopping, tree decorating. But the reason we do all that is for family, and sometimes family has to travel to be together. And sometimes traveling is not so safe.
This morning as I was lying in bed thinking that I had survived another anniversary I began to feel sad that I hadn’t written about Dad. As if ignoring the anniversary in public somehow lessened the loss or his worth. Which is, of course, not true. And it’s also not true that I didn’t think about him all day yesterday, because of course I did. And compounding all these thoughts was the fact that yesterday my brother was driving to the airport and flying up to stay with us for the holiday weekend. It was a complicated layer filled emotional day.
And the point is that though the pain recedes it never goes away, and though the fight to make our roads safer, to enforce the laws that are on the books and to pass new, even safer laws never ends, we’re all made of pretty strong stock, and we’ll keep fighting through the pain.
Next year on this anniversary I want to be able to say that we’ve made progress with the length of time a truck driver can legally drive, that we’re closer to having on-board recorders that make it harder to cheat on the hours of service rule, that we’ve stopped bigger, heavier trucks from being allowed to roam freely across the country.
For now I’m happy that Dad’s picture, along with many others, hangs in the offices of the Federal Motor Carrier Safety Administration. And that the Truck Safety Coalition is a constant reminder to them (and sometimes a bur under their skin) of the importance and urgency of their work. It’s not enough but it’s a beginning. I’m thinking we’ve already saved lives and Dad would be proud.
Meanwhile, all of you traveling this holiday weekend…be careful out there.
Guess what? Katie and I got a present from Reilly and his Mom!
How exciting! Katie got a beautiful bunny rabbit!
She could hardly stand it, having to sit still while I took a picture. And then it was all about killing that rabbit!
She’s in love!
And Bree sent me a pile of really beautiful hand made cards. One of which I am sending to my Aunt for her birthday right away!
What a lovely gift, all of it, including the CD booklet filled with pictures of Katie that I can take with me to work. In case I miss her during the day. Which you know I do.
So thank you Bree and Reilly! That was really thoughtful of you!
Katie’s sleeping with her rabbit right now. 🙂
During all the hustle and bustle of this holiday season I’m taking a small quiet moment to miss my Mom. I know I’m not alone. Many of you out there are heading into another Christmas season without a Mom. So I feel bad whining about missing my own. Still, it’s my blog and I can whine if I want to.
Last night I was putting ornaments on the tree. Husband was off to a big box store looking for plumbing parts – no, he wasn’t Christmas shopping for my gift – so I was alone with the tree and a big box full of memories. So much of what we hang on our trees are memories. The ornament from childhood, the one that was a gift from family. As I contemplated the perfect spot on the tree for each I smiled. Mom would have liked these birds in nests…a cousin gave me this box of ceramic ornaments years ago…I remember when my sister and I shopped for these glass stars.
Then I found a box filled with tissue paper, the only ornament inside a glass santa. And suddenly I remembered the last time my Mom was here, just before Christmas in 2003, when we went up to Bronners giant Christmas store and I saw this little Santa ornament. I told her I thought it was like one that her mother always had on the tree years ago. So Mom bought it for me.
This year as I put the little glass Santa in a prime spot, high up on the front of the tree, I felt that old familiar pang. I miss my Mom. And I think about how she must have missed her own Mom all those years after Grandma died, though I never asked her about it. I wish I had.
So this Christmas I hope they’re hanging ornaments on a tree together, reminiscing about Christmas days gone by. And eating Mom’s famous cranberry jello, the one with the big globe grapes and crunch celery.
Merry Christmas Mom. I’m making that cranberry jello again this year. And I’ll be thinking about you.
Maisie’s sister is for sale. She’d be about 2 years old, and I’m sure she’s a beautiful tri- sheltie. I’d love to have her. But this morning, in the early gray light of pre-dawn I recognized why having two shelties won’t work for us.
The one sheltie-girl we have had to go out at 6:30 this morning. She doesn’t know that it’s Saturday. Or that Mama had a really long week. She just knows that she goes outside at 6:30 every morning. If not earlier. So I drag myself out of bed, bundle up in layers while she hops impatiently around my feet. Out we go into the dark. Up and down the path her Dad shoveled for her. Up and down the path again. Have to smell everything. Trying to find a really good spot.
Apparently there were no good spots, and after 15 minutes she turned and trotted purposefully toward the house. I went back to bed. At 7:00 she had to go out. I told her to “GO LIE DOWN!” She did for a minute, then she was back. She had to go! I told her to GO LIE DOWN!!! She burrowed under the blanket, down to my feet and nipped my toes.
I dragged myself out of bed, put on the layers. We went out. Walked up and down the path. A lot. I sang to her “Find a spot…find a spot. Katie go bathroom.” My ears were freezing. So was my nose. We left the path and slogged through the snow, out to the road, sniffed the mailbox and then trotted briskly back up the driveway. She skidded around the corner into her path and we raced to the end of it. I was excited; surely now we’d get some action? She stood at the end of the path and looked at me. Then she trotted for the front door. I went back to bed.
Twenty minutes later she knocks me up the side of my head with her paw. She wants to go out. I didn’t even try to tell her to lie down. I dragged myself out of bed, added the layers..we went out. Read above paragraphs for the routine. We ended up back inside with no business being done.
I thought to myself. If there were TWO shelties I’d get to do all this times two. No way am I up for that. So we’ll try to find Maisie’s sister a good home, somewhere she’ll be spoiled rotten, in a warmer climate maybe, or someone with a fenced yard so going out isn’t such an ordeal.
Cause this Mama is already tired. And it’s going to be a long winter.
Misery is:
Getting up early because you know the roads are going to be bad.
Going outside to find your vehicle covered in ice and snow. And the wind is howling, making the wind chill well below zero.
The normal 40 minute commute stretching into 2.5 hours as you creep with the rest of the fools along crowded roads at an average of 6 mph.
Realizing hours later, after a short but long day of work, while walking back out to the car that the wind is still howling, it’s still freezing out. And guess what? The roads are no better.
Spending 1 hour to move 2 miles in a multi mile backup with no escape route available.
But on the other hand….Joy is:
Listening to music from the Nutcracker at 7:00, the exact hour your own community band concert should have been starting…because you have time to mess around with the radio in the new car. Given you aren’t moving anyway.
Getting an enthusiastic hand wave from the young lady you let merge into traffic ahead of you. Because really, after 45 minutes and less than a mile traversed, what does one more car matter?
Then again...misery is:
When the “holiday pops” music turns into some sort of monk chant. You change the channel to a Grateful Dead station. Who knew there was such a thing? Playing music from 12/13/1980. You’re not even a Grateful Dead fan, but this is better than the monk thing.
When you realize the young woman you let merge in front of you is texting and not paying attention. So she’s not moving ahead when she could be. OK. So it’s only going to move you up a few feet. Maybe a yard. But after 50 minutes you want every foot of progress you can get.
Watching a guy walking on the shoulder pass you. And seeing him many minutes later head over the hill about 1/2 mile away. And you’re still pretty much where you’ve been for the past 50 minutes.
Joy is:
Realizing you sort of like this Grateful Dead stuff.
Misery is:
Getting past the accident that has snarled traffic after more than an hour and 2 miles of progress and realizing the roads are still really really bad. And deciding that 6 mph is about as fast as you’re willing to go anyway.
And there are at least 20 more miles to make it home.
And that the roads are so bad you turn off the Grateful Dead. Because you don’t want to become one. And you have to listen to the sound of the wheels on the snow and ice so that you can anticipate any problems.
Finding yourself behind a really slow car just before a big hill. Who stops to turn left. Leaving you to creep up the hill of ice with no momentum. Left tire in the left turn lane which is snow covered helps. But it’s still misery.
Joy is:
After almost 3 hours you see the blue lights of the trees in your own back yard.
And your husband has plowed the driveway.
And it’s stopped snowing.
And Katie is very happy to see you.
Misery is:
Knowing the roads won’t be any better tomorrow.
We put the tree up last night. Though I grew up with fresh cut trees and I miss the smell, I don’t miss the mess. Ours comes out of the basement in a big bag.
While husband and I were setting up the tree Katie thought she’d help. Silly dog.
Later in the evening we found her curled up in the bag taking a nap. It’s hard work to be a helper dog.
Ready or not Christmas is coming! My husband and I were in a retail store the day before Halloween this year and were shocked to see it all decorated with Christmas trees and enormous ornaments. I meant to go back and get a picture, but I didn’t. Time just slips away. Now the big day is just a couple of weeks away. Are you ready? I’m not!
Today we put some lights up outside. I love to see houses all decked out in lights. I love to drive through neighborhoods after dark and look at all the colors. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy; sort of Norman Rockwell-ish. Here in Lower Michigan we’ve had lots of warm early winter days when we might have completed this task but our holiday lights didn’t venture up from their basement bins. Today, with a big snow storm headed our way we couldn’t put it off any longer.
Remember last year when I put everything away in their holiday bins? I was so proud of us, being so organized, everything in it’s red and green bin, labeled and ready for next year.
We packed all the lights and outdoor cords neatly away, so as to make this year so much easier. I don’t know what happened.
Somehow the Grinch must have gotten into those bins over the summer, because the lights and cords were a tangled mess this morning!
But after much work I got most of it sorted out. Katie helped.
And now I’m anxiously waiting for the evening to fall so that I can enjoy my very own holiday lights. This year we put some on the smaller trees in the backyard. Can’t wait to see what the neighborhood deer think about that!
Have a wonderful rest of your weekend everyone! Katie sends hugs.
Somehow Katie hasn’t wormed her way into the last few posts. And she’s not very happy about being ignored. She has special things she can do if we ignore her too long…specially messy and/or loud things…so we don’t want to do that.
So with no further ado…..here’s Katie!
Have a good weekend everyone! We’ll be getting snow, maybe a lot of snow…so I’m sure we’ll have fresh photos for all of you soon!
Change Is Hard 