Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.

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Agility! and Rally too!

Guess what?  Katie had a full day of school yesterday.  After so many weeks off, her spring break I guess, we went to Rally class in the morning and Agility in the evening!  I really debated whether to enroll her in the Agility class because we were already committed to the Rally class on Thursdays.   But about an hour before the agility class I asked Katie, who was sprawled out sleeping near my feet, if she wanted to go back to school…and she jumped up, tongue rolling out and grinned at me, then ran for the door.  I took that as a “YES MAMA!!!”

In Rally I’m having trouble with her focus, and she’s surging ahead quite a bit.  So much to see, so many doggy butts to sniff.  I want to get those two more legs for our Rally Novice so I need to make sure we’re working on our heeling every day.  She’s much better when she and I are alone out in the driveway then when we’re in a ring with 8 or 9 or more other dogs, trotting around in a big circle.  But still.

As for Agility?  Well, she wasn’t sure what was up at first.  We are in the beginning agility class (the last one we took was like preschool, pre-agility!)  with about 9 other mostly really big dogs.  There are actually about 15 dogs in the class, but they broke it into two groups, those who had been through this class before, and those of us who had not.  Maybe eventually we’ll all be together, but I hope not, as that would be a BIG class!

We worked on jumps (no problem MOM!) and teeter (I HATE teeter MOM!) and tunnel (ZOOOOOM!!!) and A-frame (Again!  I want to do it AGAIN MOM!) and tire (BOOOOORING!).    We obviously need to keep working on that tiny teeter out in our driveway.  Though before our rally class in the morning she ran up the teeter all by herself, so it might have been more that she didn’t like the stranger hovering nearby then the teeter itself.  Who knows?

Last night she slept great.  No wonder!


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Sleep apnea and truck drivers

I’ve been in Baltimore…did I forget to tell you?  There was a sleep apnea conference sponsored by the ATA (American Truck Association) and the FMCSA (Federal Motor Carrier Safety Administration).  We at Truck Safety Coalition have improved our relationships with these two organizations enough to attend the opening reception…and to award a Safety Leadership award – our first ever – to a man who is in charge of safety at one of the country’s largest truck companies.

And as if it was meant to be, the man who has done the most to improve safety over the past six years is the man in charge of safety at the truck company that killed Dad.  The man who looked all of us kids in the eye years ago and promised he’d do something to make the roads safer.  And though there is still a long way to go, which he acknowledged, he has worked tirelessly to make a difference, all the while keeping Dad’s picture on his desk as a constant reminder.

I was able to say a few words about Dad and about Mr. Osterberg’s work, and to hand him the award on Tuesday night.  I truly believe that Dad would have approved of what Mr. Osterberg has done so far.  And that Dad would continue to push for more.  So we will too.

There were probably 200 people in the ballroom during the cocktail and finger food reception where we spoke.  I thought perhaps, since we were going last, that most would wander away after Anne Ferro, the FMCSA administrator made her welcoming speech.  But I didn’t notice anyone leaving.  And several people told me later that you could hear a pin drop while I was talking about Dad.  That makes me feel good.

I think we made some progress that night, in mending years of wary sparring between organizations.   Maybe now everyone will realize we aren’t anti-trucking.  We’re  for safe trucking.  It’s a common goal and we can waste less time and resources if we work toward it together.

Thanks Mr. Osterberg, for remembering Dad and for working so hard to “fix it.”  We’ll be watching for the next developments.


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Mother's Day flowers

My Mom loved flowers – any kind of flowers – but mostly she liked wildflowers.  You know, the kind you’d find on the side of the road or in the woods, or peaking out from behind rocks in the mountains, leaning into the breeze on an ocean coastline.  The unexpected, the often missed, the little known.  The ones you just catch a glimpse of, that you have to buy a book from the local bookseller to identify. Though we usually bought her a flats of petunias for Mother’s Day, perhaps her favorite gifts would be the grubby handfuls of flowers we’d bring home from the woods where we played as kids.

I remembered memories of our tramps in the woods yesterday as I drove on our neighborhood country roads.  I passed a bunch of trillium in full bloom.  Mom especially enjoyed these flowers because they were (in those days) so rare.  Yesterday, thinking of her, I turned around and went back for a photo.

And I’ve also noticed that  the marsh marigolds are blooming along the swampy stream beds.  Once when I was a pre-teen I brought her a bucket or two filled with these plants, dug up from the bogs along the lake we lived on.  We planted them along our own shoreline, but I don’t remember whether or not they flourished there.  I do remember how happy I was dragging home the heavy, bog splattered buckets, my legs black with wet peat, arms aching, back straining, bringing them home to my Mom who was delighted, as always.

So this Mother’s Day morning Katie and I went out in search of a photo of a marsh marigold.  It was 36 degrees, but the sun was shining as I scrambled down a bank to a small but overflowing stream.  Mom would have loved it, there were golden flowers galore.  But a chickadee, a titmouse and a robin were very upset that I had invaded their own mother’s day celebrations, so I snapped my pictures as quickly as I could, then returned to Katie who was waiting in the car.

So Happy Mother’s Day, Mom.    I’d send a bucket of marsh marigolds to you, but FTD doesn’t deliver in heaven.


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Springtime, breakfast on the deck, and an Anna Quindlen book review

We’re sitting on the deck, Katie and I, this lovely spring morning.  I’m rocking and eating my cereal, she’s lying at my feet.  I’ve brought a book out to read, Zada Smith’s White Teeth, but to be honest I’m still too emotionally engaged in the book I finished at 2 this morning  to begin another one so soon.  And this spring morning filled with the sound of newly minted birch leaves shaking in the breeze and rambunctious birds exploring the bird feeders has me mesmerized as well.

Katie and I have been sitting still for awhile, and multitudes of birds are at our feeders, just feet from us.  The titmice have found the new feeder, and being brave, are the first to explore the treats there.  A blue heron, the first I’ve seen this spring glides just overhead, a silent dinosaur of a bird.  I’m reminded that I saw our  resident green herons a couple of days ago, a sure sign that it’s spring.  Off in the distance I can hear a sandhill crane flying somewhere, and here in my own yard a song sparrow has been singing nonstop since before we sat down.  The neighbor’s rooster chimes in.

Last night I was reading Anna Quindlen’s   Every Last One.  It’s her latest novel, the story of a family with three teenage children, told by the mother.  From the front jacket flap I knew something terrible happens, and I read the first 100+ pages slowly, not wanting to get to the bad part.  But the author tells the story almost gently, letting the details seep in slowly over the course of the rest of the book, because knowing the reality in total would just be  too much to bear.  So much like real life, sometimes we have to dull the details until later when we’re strong enough to recognize them.

Once I was past the traumatic event (I won’t tell you what because you might want to read the book.) I couldn’t put the book down.  It’s been a long long time since I stayed up almost all night reading.  Probably not since before my parents died.  It’s like Quinland gets it, gets me, knows exactly the tiniest details about the inside of my brain and the thoughts that flash unexpectedly through my head at the strangest times, the memories that catch me by surprise, the instant shaft of pain that pierces at the oddest moment.

This morning as I watch and listen to the birds and the breeze in the tops of my trees I remember bits of the book, intermingled with bits of my own life.   Here’s the last little bit of the book, edited slightly so that you can’t tell exactly what happened, so as not to spoil it for anyone.

“How are you holding up?” my mother said the other day when she called to tell me about their Thanksgiving travel plans.

I’m trying,”  I replied.

“That’s good,” she said.  “That’s all anyone can ask.”


Exactly.


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More obedience.

Katie and I went to another drop in competitive obedience class, this one right across the freeway from the airport, last night.  Since I was away almost 6 weeks and Katie didn’t get to go to school during all that time I’m trying to make up to her and go as often as we can.  She had fun, mostly, and was pretty close to perfect, in her own Katie kind of way.   Except on the long down when, as I was walking away a plane went by low and loud overhead at the same time the thunder started.  When I turned around, on the other side of the ring, Katie was right behind me…looking sheepish, but scared.  Poor baby, I couldn’t yell at her.

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But guess what?  She did TWO stand-for-exam exercises for two different instructors and didn’t move her feet at all!!

You go Katie-girl!

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Playing

Wanna PLAY??

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It’s raining here, so Katie and I are playing inside.  Here are my attempts to get that perfect photo.   First the tunnel – – should be no problem, right?  Well, here’s the first shot I got!  LOL!

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So we tried again.  I couldn’t get the anti-red eye thingy to work, but it’s cute anyway:

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And then the chute, which was even more challenging to photograph.  I put her in a sit/wait  in front of it, then ran around and got ready for the photo, then yelled “CHUTE!” and she’d head through.  Obviously the first couple times I was too quick with the shutter finger!

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And then I was a little late.

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Geeze Mom!  How many times do I have to do this before you get the shot?

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A few more times baby!  OOPS!  Missed you, let’s try that again…

Katie 2616GOTCHA!!

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Later today?  We’re going to obedience class…gotta rest up…

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Shelties and their boxes

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A couple of days ago I ran across a Petco in a part of town I don’t usually shop.  I popped in to see if they happened to have Riley’s (the CowSpotDog) favorite treats and guess what?  They did!  I haven’t been able to find them for quite some time, so I picked  up a few of them for him, and Katie and I packed up a little box to mail to Riley.  Katie was very anxious to make sure that Riley got these treats, as she feels very sad that Riley’s Mom is having such a hard time getting better from surgery.  If you haven’t read about Riley you can here:  http://cowspotdog.blogspot.com/

Then later in the day two boxes came for Katie, via the nice UPS man.  She was very excited.  She got a TUNNEL!  And a CHUTE!  She could hardly wait while I unpacked the tunnel.  Here she is with it partially undone, when she just had to investigate.

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As soon as we got it open she walked casually through, then asked what treats she was going to get!  We thought she’d have more issues with the chute, but she ran through that a bunch of times in the kitchen with no problem.

I’m sure you’ll get more pictures from us once we take these new toys out in the yard!

Katie 2603


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Unexpected

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I had my whole day planned out yesterday.  The 2 mile run, some job searching stuff, then off to the grocery store for Aunt V,  deliver the groceries to her and visit a bit, then on to donate my old cell phone to a woman’s shelter, then maybe a bit of shopping just for fun.  But you know what they say about the best laid plans.

I got the 2 mile run in, and completed a job application for a library job nearby.  I was crabby because I had suffered a lack of sleep the night before.  I was hanging onto my plan somewhat desperately –  all I really wanted to do was head back to bed – when the phone rang and husband said it was my Ann Arbor Aunt.  For a moment I thought “DRATS!  I can’t fit anything else into my overly planned day!”

And it’s true she DID want to get together to do something.  In the beginning I wasn’t feeling very gracious, but reason overcame my illogical crabbiness.  She wanted to meet me and Katie down at our favorite park, which is halfway between where we both live.  And it was sunny out!  AND I’d been thinking I should take Katie to that park someday soon, it’s so beautiful in the spring.  So I revamped the plan and agreed to meet her.

I packed up Katie and all her stuff (you know the drill; water, bowl, leashes, treat bag, poop bag) and me and the camera and off we went.  I could feel the morning’s tension seeping away.  Especially when we crested a hill and I noticed the beautiful clouds.  I just had to stop and capture them.  Good thing I left the house early for our 2:00 p.m. meeting…lots of time for pictures!

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Then about half way to the park I realized I had forgotten the poop bag!  And Katie ALWAYS does her job almost as soon as we start our walks in the park.  It’s like she saves it up for a public place.  SIGH.  So I did a little U-turn and stopped at the bank to get some cash, then a bit later on we stopped in at Colsanti’s, a little grocery store.  It’s kind of a plant nursery, gourmet groceries and produce market complete with a bird aviary.  I’d been there once before a long time ago.  My plan was to find something to buy that I actually needed and which would require them to give me a plastic grocery bag.  Which I could use as a poop bag.  Good thing I left home early….lots of time for grocery shopping!

As I was contemplating purchasing white potatoes or strawberries I heard a strange sound directly overhead.  I glanced up and saw a large toy train chugging along on a suspended track.  Strange I thought, but then as I looked around, the whole place was quite eclectic.  Mounds of fruit and vegetables, a gift store with cute little things, pots of plants, a wonderful deli, and a train circling overhead.

I bought some potatoes, a few scones and some crunchy cheese sticks and headed back to the car and Katie.  As I stepped outside something made a terrible screeching sound.  The noise was coming from a huge outdoor bird aviary.  Peacocks!  Dropping off the groceries, checking on Katie who was waiting patiently in her crate in the car, I grabbed the camera and went to investigate the birds.

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They were beautiful!  Several blue peacocks, and a giant white peacock who was showing off.  Plus some turkeys all puffed up.  I watched them for a few minutes then realized I needed to get to the park!  Good thing I left early…

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When Katie and I arrived at the designated meeting place deep in the park (at exactly 1:59) my Aunt was already there, and soon Katie, she and I were off on a walk.  The place was beautiful, swans out on the water, wildflowers tucked into the trees, dogwoods in bloom, the redbuds were splashes of bright fuchsia among the lime green new leaves of the larger trees, huge patches of wild purple violets smudging the ground.  Gorgeous.  You won’t see pictures of this because the camera battery died right about then.  So you’ll have to imagine it yourself, which in reality is sometimes better anyway!

We walked 2.4 miles, and Katie did really well.  And that poop bag that I went so far out of my way to acquire?  We never needed it.  Of course.

So the lesson learned is this.  When you’re crabby, when you feel like you need to get certain stuff done, when you’re not feeling creative or adventurous, let it go, take the road presented to you, keep your eyes open and I bet you’ll see some beautiful stuff.

When you’re least expecting it.

Katie 2541


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What I was GOING to write about

I was going to describe last weekend’s wonderful, last of the season, Ann Arbor Symphony for you, but the words just aren’t flowing.

I was going to talk about Saturday’s obedience class, the first one Katie’s attended in almost two months, where she was “heeling” with her head down and ears flat because of all the new barking dogs, but really that was about all there was to talk about, she was a crazy girl and it’s obvious that we need to work every day to get back confidence we’ve both lost.

I was going to write about a coffee meeting I attended this morning with my Congressman Mike Rogers where I was hoping to ask him what specifically he was doing to make our highways safer, as his answers to my emails are usually generically vague.  But the talk was health care, pretty heated and there was no room for other issues.

I thought about telling you about my 2 mile run/walk this morning.  It’s significant because I haven’t run in 18 months, but two miles seems too small to mention, and I walked quite a bit of it.  Then again I ran quite a bit of it too.  But still.

And some of you may be wondering how the Aunt is doing, and I have to say she’s doing so well there really isn’t anything to tell you.

And I was going to go purchase some pansies in celebration of spring.  But the pot they’re going in is still empty so there’s really nothing to show you yet.

And there’s the painting I started while I was up north.  I worked on an unsuccessful version most of my time up there, but toward the end, the last couple of days, I started over and am quite pleased with it so far.  But I haven’t worked on it since I got home and I don’t want to show it to you.  Yet.

And I’ve contemplated lately talking about how frustrating it is not to be able to work in the field that my heart believes I am meant to be.  Unemployment is not all it’s cracked up to be, and I’m not talking about the loss of income.  But I don’t want to depress you and I’m not even sure how I feel about the whole job search thing yet.  So I’m waiting and thinking about all of that.

So all in all I just don’t have anything to write about.

Just yet anyway.

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Settling down now

Trees 1538Yesterday was our first day of normal life in quite some time.  I’d been out of town for three weeks, home for one day and then involved in our Aunt’s medical crisis for more than two more weeks.  Yesterday we didn’t have to be anywhere, though husband did stop by the Aunt’s just to see how her first night alone in almost three weeks went.  Thankfully, she did fine and I’m sure she’s just as happy as we are to have us off her living room sofa.

Katie and I did some yard work; weeding and sniffing and such things as that.  Sometimes all we did was sit in the sun and enjoy being with each other.  I think that counts as yard work too.

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I dug up a small bed that had filled in with grass and weeds over the past couple of summers.  I’ll replant it later this spring.  It was a lot of work and reminds me that last time I dug this up I was younger and fitter.

While digging I came across these small plants, greenish red leaves and blue purple bells of flowers.  Tiny.  The smell when I crushed the leaves took me right back to my grandmother’s farm, where these lived in her lawn, particularly, as I recall, back by grandpa’s workshop.  I sat in the sun and crunched leaves and remembered playing on the farm, picking black raspberries, watching the pigs, playing with barn kittens.  It was a good place to play.  There are good memories there.

I  accidentally left a weed or two in my own garden yesterday just so I can pull them later and smell that old familiar small and relive the memories.

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Later on I got out the tiny teeter and Katie was all raring to go, walking over it, still carefully, especially at the pivot point, but without any apparent fear.  So I went and got her Dad, to show him how much more confident she is.  And guess what?  While he stood in the door watching she first refused to do the teeter at all, then CREPT up to the pivot point and laid down on it.  Well, that’s new!  And now she won’t go on it at all.

Ah Katie girl.  We’re going to school in about an hour, the first time in probably 6 or 7 weeks.  Hope you remember a little bit about heeling and staying.

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Should be interesting!