Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.


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Happy Mother's Day!

Mother’s Day has rolled around again, our 7th one without her. In years past I’ve been pretty successful at ignoring the day, averting my eyes when going by the card section at the grocery store, turning the channel when an advertisement comes on the television.

This year it doesn’t seem to be such a painful day, and I can feel happy for other people and other mothers.  Sure I still miss my own, but I can appreciate the day for what it is, a celebration of women everywhere.  And I recognize how very lucky we were to have the Mom we did for as long as we did.

So Happy Mother’s Day to you all of you!  I hope it’s all sunshine and happy moments – enjoy your day!


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No good reason to get wet

I think we need a bit of relief from all the solemnity around here lately.  So of course I will turn to my go-to dog Katie to bring a smile to all our faces.  And it just happens that Reilly is holding another contest, hoping we’ll all share our cutest “having fun with water” photos.

I’m pretty sure Katie isn’t a beach dog, and she probably doesn’t like swimming, though she hasn’t had the opportunity to try either of these activities yet.  She has been around ponds and lakes and is always very careful not to get her feet wet.

She likes posing near water.  Heck she likes posing near anything!

Sometimes she isn’t thrilled when the water is frozen either.  But it’s spring so we won’t go there.

 

She goes to a groomer for her bath, so I’ve never seen her completely wet, and I didn’t think it was fair to put her in the tub this morning just so I could see what she looks like when she’s soaked.  So the closest I could come to a wet Katie-girl was to run around in the tall wet grass this morning.  Here she is in all her morning sogginess.

 

Katie says the only good reason to get wet is if there’s something exciting to chase!

And the best water is the water in her bowl.

She may have a point!

 

 

 

 


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DC Wrapup

The Truck Safety Coalition is a non-profit that works with safety advocates to advance the agenda of safer highways across the country.  This year we celebrated it’s 20th anniversary.  It’s a wonderful organization and I wish I didn’t belong to it.  Because for a person to belong to this group usually means there has been loss and suffering.  Someone related to almost all members of the group has been killed or injured in a truck related crash.

Every two years the TSC hosts a conference called Sorrow to Strength where heartbroken families gather to share their sorrow and reap the strength that being together affords.  On Saturday and Sunday while we listen to each others stories we learn  how to tell our own, how to talk to the media, to bring attention to our issues.  We learn how government works and which issues are closest to being achieved and where we should put our focused efforts.  We become lobbyists extraordinaire.

Monday and Tuesday we are scheduled in meetings with our members of Congress, with transportation committee members, and with the staff of regulatory agencies.   Each of us has our own schedule and they are chock full.  Sometimes we’ll see other members of our group coming or going from Senate or House buildings, or eating in the cafeteria deep beneath “The Hill.”  But essentially we’re on our own, telling our stories, asking support for our issues.  Trying not to cry, but not feeling so bad when we don’t succeed at remaining clear-eyed. Everywhere we go we’re wearing pins with our family member’s face and we’re carrying larger pictures of them too.  My photo collage had a couple pictures of Dad, and a picture of the car taken after the crash; people seem drawn to the destruction.  Whatever helps the cause.

One of the issues we pushed this year was getting Electronic On Board Recorders mandated on all commercial vehicles.  I was in DC 18 months ago when we met with the Secretary of Transportation, Ray LaHood, and requested that he move along a bit faster in his study of the problem of fatigued drivers who were driving longer than was legal and risking the lives of all who share the roads with the big rigs.  At that point he was planning on putting out a memo to start thinking about maybe looking into EOBR’s.  I was frustrated. This weekend I learned that the DOT has actually put together a proposed rule that would mandate that EOBR’s be installed on all commercial vehicles.  I am elated.

At the end of a meeting with Federal Motor Carrier Safety Administrator Anne Ferro I gave her a hug and told her I knew she was working hard at important issues.  She hugged me back and said she knew it wasn’t fast enough.  We’re on the same page.

Every year that goes by another 4000 people die in truck related crashes, and another 100,000 are injured.  We don’t have time for the over analysis of no brainer decisions.  Every industrialized country in the world has had EOBR’s for years.  Here in the states we let drivers keep track of how many hours they drive by writing it down in a paper logbook.  How much analysis does it take to figure out the logbooks are fraudulent?

Meanwhile, we also have a bill being introduced by a Democratic Senator to mandate EOBRs.  We’re looking for a Republican cosponsor.  It’s another way to get the EOBR’s on trucks, just in case the DOT doesn’t move forward with their proposed rule.  We’re also trying to get mandated EOBR’s put on a major transportation re-authorization bill.  We don’t care how it happens, as long as it happens soon.  We’re pushing all three processes in the hopes that one of them actually makes our goal a reality.

This is getting long and I haven’t even told you about the Hours of Service reduction that might happen soon or the increase in liability insurance we’re pushing.  I haven’t told you about side under-ride guards we want installed, the SHIPA bill that freezes size and weight restrictions, or the underlying safety problem, which is the way drivers are paid.  I guess all that will have to wait for another blog entry someday.

Meanwhile, if you’ve read this far, thank you.  We can’t do this alone.  We need everyone’s support, and if the EOBR bill makes it to a point of being voted on I’ll let you know so you can ask your Senator to support us.

And if you read or hear about truck crashes in your area, please forward any links or information to the Truck Safety Coalition at their website.  Last year we contacted over 700 families to offer help.  This year we expect to do even more.

We had three or four new families at the conference this year; their loss is recent, their grief is raw, uncontrollable.  All we could do was hold them, let them cry and cry with them.  Their stories are horrific.  We have to make a difference because this can’t go on.

So stay safe everyone; call us if anyone needs us.  We’ll be there.  Membership is not restricted.  Unfortunately.

 

 


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Where to begin

I have so much to tell you and hardly know where to start.  I could start with the fact that an expensive hotel room that charges extra for internet access won’t get my business again.  The combination of being booked from morning to night with appointments and not having access to the internet in our room means that you didn’t get daily updates of our activities while we were in DC.

We’re home now and though my heart says I need to write this blog entry before I forget the intense emotions of the last four days, my head says I need to get to sleep in order to function at work tomorrow.

So I’ll leave you with a little hope.  We are so close to having Electronic On Board Records mandated on all commercial trucks to help us enforce the hours of service rule, and we are so close to having reduced hours of service for commercial drivers.  We have the ear of the Department of Transportation, the Federal Motor Carrier Safety Administration, and the NTSB and many other important transportation committees  that regulate commercial vehicles.  We were heard.

I’ll tell you more later.  For now, stay safe everyone.

 

 

 


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Heading to DC

I’m on my way to DC this weekend.  It’s our semi-annual Truck Safety Coalition Sorrow to Strength conference.  Seems like we were just there, but it’s been two years.  Every time we go to this conference we say that we’re going to go a day early, stay a day late, and then we never have the time.  This year we’re flying out in the morning and arriving about an hour before the conference starts.  We’ll be in meetings over the weekend, then in appointments on Monday and Tuesday, talking to anyone and everyone that will listen.

I’ll tell you more about it later.  I’m a bit worried that with all the hoopla going on in Washington our story just isn’t going to get the attention we need.  But I feel that way every year. I guess it’s up to us to make enough noise to get noticed.

I should take lessons from Katie; she’s got that down pat.

 


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Signs of spring

It’s kind of scary to say out loud but I think we’ve turned the corner from winter into spring.  The male gold finches are gold now, and the grass has greened up with all the rain.  Here are a few other signs of impending warmth way up here in Michigan.

There are lots of pretty things popping up all over.

There are pretty things showing up  at stores too.  Have you noticed?

We’ve got a new neighbor who’s settling in at the local pond.

There are buds on some of the trees; here’s a big bud unfurling on the pear tree.

And my favorite, the red bud tree is getting ready to put on a show any day now.

But mostly the biggest sign of spring is that Katie and I get outside a lot more!

It feels pretty special and we’re trying hard to take the time to appreciate it.  She figures that means more walks.

She’s probably right.


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Photo scavenger hunt

Karma, over on her blog has challenged people everywhere to a photo scavenger hunt.  I learned about it late while visiting Gerry over at her blog and though it sounded like fun I wasn’t going to do it because I didn’t think I had the time.  Plus I was intimidated by the list of things we needed to photograph:

Body of water

Train

Hood

Sprout

Bud

Basket

Bunny

…and for extra credit a clear picture of a cardinal!

Where would I find a train to photograph?  I thought about going to the zoo which I knew had a miniature train.  But that would take all day and I don’t have all day…and who knew if the train was even running so early in the season?

In the end I decided to go for it and just see how many of these things I could find in a couple of hours around here.  Want to see?  Well follow me!

Body of water:  As I was driving I thought about all the hundreds of photos I have of the Great Lakes, the ponds near here, the lake in Alabama where our summer house is.  Lots of beautiful water.  But today I was feeling more quirky and when I saw this body of water out of the corner of my eye I turned around and went back.

I liked how the sign reflected in the big puddle on this dirt road.  While I was taking photos of the mud I was startled by the sound of footsteps coming up behind me.  Turns out it was a guy that owned a business across the street.  He thought I was some sort of surveyor and wanted to know what the plans were for the land.  I have no idea, but we talked about cameras and photography for quite awhile until he had a customer and headed back to work.

Train:.  Well this one is not so easy, and the photo challenge that was the most intimidating.  But I remembered a train yard that I sometimes pass on my way to work.  I figured on a Saturday morning I might be able to get a photo before anyone told me to leave. So I stopped by, crawled through some brush and hopped over some mud filled ditches.  And there were pieces of trains!

I have to say it was a bit creepy in the train yard and I didn’t go far into it or stay more than a minute or two.

Hood:  I really wanted to find some kid on the streets of the city to photograph…but that was way too scary.  So I settled for me.

Scary enough anyway.

Sprout:  I was planning on scouting out the yard as there are lots of things sprouting in the garden.  But when I got back to the house lunch time was looming and I got motivated by this instead:

It was yummy.

Bud:  Driving through town I noticed that one of my favorite stands to buy annuals was open.  There were lots of buds there, colorful buds, pinks and reds and purples.  But I liked the color of this one.

Basket:  I saw a pretty Easter basket in a store but I had the big camera with me and felt sort of goofy taking a picture right there in the aisle.  And I figured I must have some sort of basket at home.  Of course I did, so I dug it out of the back of a cabinet where it had been long forgotten.  Look how nice the light bounces off it’s woven side.

I think it’s much prettier than the gaudy Easter baskets I was almost sucked into shooting.

Bunny:  Well this is a story.  My husband and I have a tradition of giving each other chocolate Easter bunnies each year.  So I was in a store this morning looking for one to buy him.  And of course one to photograph for this project.  I found an elegant bunny that was extravagantly expensive.  But I figured I’d get two commitments out of one bunny…the photo project and the traditional bunny to the husband thing.

But right after I left the store with my $5.00 rabbit I saw, across the street, this:

…which you have to admit is a BUNNY! Though not as elegant.  But definitely bigger!

Extra credit Cardinal:

Well….Mr. Cardinal has been illusive.  He’s been to the feeder a few times this morning, but he’s a shy one and flies off as soon as I try to get a shot.  There’s the opening of the camera, the turning it on, the setting…it’s all so much more time consuming then the point and shoot.  So you’re going to have to wait a bit for the bonus shot.  But if I ever get it, you’ll be the first to know!

 

 

 

 


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Coming clean

It rained last night.  A lot.  Sometimes there was thunder which is something that always gets little Katie going.  Where Bonnie (the sister sheltie Katie never met) would tremble and cry, then curl up in the smallest possible ball and wait a storm out, Katie takes it on.   She squares her shoulders, plants her feet and barks hysterically at the ceiling or the window, wherever she feels the danger might be coming from because she’s got a family to protect!  Nobody in this family got a lot of sleep last night.

This morning Katie and I did a bit of walking around the yard.  We got completely drenched.  Katie’s fur does the prettiest thing when it gets wet.  It gets curly! (click on the picture to make it bigger so you can see her curly fur!)  This is the closest she wants to get to a bath!

But what I really wanted to talk about was a different kind of ‘coming clean.’  The one where you’re honest about what’s really happening.  I need to tell you how it’s going with two commitments I’ve made; one is to do 30 minutes of exercise for 30 days, and the other is to write at least one letter a week every week from sometime in March (I can’t remember the exact date) until Memorial Day.

I’m happy to say the letter writing campaign is still going, though it’s become more difficult to find people to write to as the weeks go by.  I still have some ideas though and should be able to finish this challenge.  If I get a letter out today that is.  I made Wednesdays my letter writing days…but recently it’s suddenly been Saturday and I realize I have to write to someone RIGHT NOW!  Still it’s been fun.  And I’ve been using some lovely cards that Bree at “Wipe Your Paws” made for me.  They are one of a kind and I’m sure people love to receive them!

The 30 minutes for 30 days commitment?  Not going as well.  For the first 10 days I managed to get myself outside to walk at lunch or weekend mornings.  Then the world seemed to get in the way.  Horrible weather, crazy work days, lack of motivation seemed to overwhelm me.  I missed one day, and committed to adding an additional day on the back of the 30 days.  Then I missed another day.  I tell myself there are no excuses.

Now I’m working on convincing myself that a day lost should not sink the entire program.  Just like a diet, when you fall off the wagon the worst thing you can do is give up completely.  So maybe I need to make that goal a bit smaller, so that I can achieve something and not beat myself up so much.  I remind myself that in dog training we set tasks simple enough so that the dog can be rewarded.  We try not to set the dog up to fail.  That positive reinforcement works better than negative talking.  What works for my dog should work for me, right?

So I need to figure out a way to get myself into the habit of daily exercise with smaller, baby step tasks, so that I gradually make exercise a priority in my sometimes hectic life.  Any suggestions?  I welcome all ideas!

Meanwhile, soggy Katie and I are going to make time for an adventure this Easter weekend.  We hope all of you  have time for adventures too!

 


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Seize the moment

Long time apartment neighbors of Aunt Vi, Clarence and his wife were both 100 years old when I first met them last year.  Sadly, she  tripped over a curb while out doing errands several months ago and died after hip surgery.  Clarence, lost because they’d been married for more than 70 years, muddled along without her, but it became clear that he needed the additional help that living in assisted living would provide.

He moved into a lovely place three weeks ago, and Aunt V and I visited with him last week.  He looked great, and though he couldn’t hear worth a darn, even with the hearing aids in both ears, he enjoyed the company.  What man wouldn’t?  There he was with Aunt Vi, me, another woman from the apartment building and his niece.  One grinning guy surrounded by ladies.

We sat in the sunroom, with spring poking it’s shining face in the windows.  The ladies talked among themselves, then would poke Clarence and say “Tell Dawn that story about…” and after much yelling back and forth until he was sure which story they wanted, off he’d go.  His stories were long and funny, and I’m sure the others had heard them many times, but I hadn’t and I was charmed by this slight, stooped man with the twinkling eyes, sweet grin and big hands.

I asked him what he did when he was working.  He straightened up in his chair, suddenly the proud, strong man he must have been in younger days.  “I ran a gas station,” he said.  He told me where but I couldn’t place it, so I just smiled and nodded.  He talked about being a mechanic all his days, right up until he retired, which he still felt was just yesterday.

We had a really nice visit and as Aunt Vi kissed him goodbye she told him we’d be back for another.  We left him sitting in the sunny room, smiling and waving.  We were smiling too.

That’s the way I’m going to remember Clarence.  He died yesterday and I am as shocked as I would be if he were eighteen.    I just wasn’t ready, I’d had no warning.  And heck, I’m not even a relative and probably talked to him a total of 3 or 4 over the past year.  But still.

Clarence was a very cool man.  I’m sorry I didn’t get to know him better.  But I’m really glad we went to visit him last week and I got to hear his stories, laugh with him, shake his hand.

True loves just can’t be separated.  Clarence and his wife are together again.  And tonight we’ll be with Aunt Vi who clearly needs a hug.