Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.

On loss and spring


I’ve been to a lot of funerals held in winter and I used to think the hardest thing in the world was to walk away after a winter graveside ceremony, bowed with grief, huddled in a coat against the wind and rain or snow. Though you knew your loved one couldn’t feel the cold it was just so hard to leave them there in the darkening light of a winter day.

I used to think that was the worst.

But yesterday, when a local family had to leave their young man behind in the cemetery, the sun was shining and the bright blue sky was filled with puffy white clouds. It was a perfect spring day.

And now I wonder. Maybe losing a young life in the midst of the hope that is spring is the worst.

Yesterday a family had to come to grips with a life ended way too soon. I don’t know them, or the young man gone, but I understand their shock. Accidents happen, but never to your family. Never to someone with an infant and a wife and loving parents and a huge extended family.

Never just as spring is blooming with promise.

How can someone just be gone when so much around us is bursting into life? How does a young wife with an infant son survive without the loving husband, the doting father, at her side?

How does a family walk away from a new grave, bowed with grief, when bright blue skies are smiling down? It just seems wrong. Certainly the sky should be crying too.

But this young wife is strong, and she has a strong family to help her. She has good friends to listen and provide support. They know that sometimes the road takes an unexpected turn; they know how to navigate grief. They’ve been there before.

She’ll be OK eventually. And her son will grow up surrounded by people who will tell him about his daddy. How he loved his family. How he will always be there in their hearts.

It takes family and friends to get through grief filled but beautiful spring days when life is bursting from every tree and shrub, every bulb and seed, but tears are hiding behind every eyelid.

May the beauty of spring moving on into summer give some comfort to a family whose hearts have been broken once again.

And may that tiny little boy know that he is truly loved.

Author: dawnkinster

I'm a long time banker having worked in banks since the age of 17. I took a break when I turned 50 and went back to school. I graduated right when the economy took a turn for the worst and after a year of library work found myself unemployed. I was lucky that my previous bank employer wanted me back. So here I am again, a long time banker. Change is hard.

25 thoughts on “On loss and spring

  1. Whatever the season, the loss hurts. There is no “good” time to lose one you love. The only good is that the sun will shine, growth will happen, and people are resilient.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t think there is a better or worse season. Every person is unique, and so every loss is absolute. But you’re right, Dawn–we do go on. Have you seen the movie “Collateral Beauty”? Not a great film, but the basic idea is an important one.


  3. This was so beautifully expressed. It is always so hard to see the loss of life so young.


  4. Beautifully written – I guess it depends on your outlook – for me a death in spring means time of renewal – as things die in winter – so they grow in spring I like to think of a loved one lost in spring as blooming into something else – existing on another plain

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Such gorgeous photos … and such a sad subject. Loss is hard, whatever time of season. I, too, used to think the drab gray days were worst, but you’ve shed some insight into how hard it must be for a young family to lose someone in the spring. Here’s a prayer they’ll find comfort amid their sorrow.


  6. When they leave, they leave the pain with you. (And the disorganization of death.)


  7. Your words and your pictures…heartfelt and beautiful.


  8. I often think of a friend of mine who died a few years ago when the sky is blue as in your photos and spring is blooming and am saddened to think she is missing it, not here to see it. Heartfelt words Dawn, and so relatable for me.


  9. Beautiful, heartbreaking and obviously from the heart post, Dawn.


  10. Beautifully written. Beautiful words. So sad for this family. Hope that they will get the support they need from family and friends. It sounds as though they are comforted by a network of family and friends.


  11. Pingback: A springtime walk – breezes at dawn

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