Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.

The gift of time


I woke up this morning and watched my girl sleeping curled up in her bed at the foot of mine. These days I watch her breathing and feel grateful for another day.

Welcome to one of my parks!

She’s doing so well, we have her stabilized and she’s been good for several months now. She’s eating meals and doing her jobs regularly. Her poo passes the ‘looks normal’ test, and she’s drinking water on her own again.

It was a cool and windy day. Perfect.

I know she’s still in stage 4 kidney disease but you wouldn’t know by looking at her. What you will notice is she walks more stiffly, and her back legs give out if she tries to jump, or goes around a corner too fast.

This is my yard today!

I take her to her parks as often as I can, knowing that she loves to be out and about, especially in her woods, on her trails, checking under her picnic tables. Her ears don’t hear much anymore, and I suspect her eyesight isn’t perfect. But her nose works just fine.

And she’s a happy girl.

I love it out here, mama!

That’s the most important thing, that she’s happy.

She still barks at squirrels on her deck, at diesel trucks going by, at neighborhood dogs, at people walking on her street without a sheltie permit. She loves her meals, all five plus one late night snack of them. She still loves her walks through her neighborhood.

Let me at that snowball!

Two days ago I took her to one of her parks and we walked the earthen levy at the end of the lake. It was a windy day, no one was out there but us and she got to roam freely. She wasn’t at all ready to get back in the car when I was. She’d obviously dressed better for the adventure than me.

Something smells different about this snow!

This morning she received a special gift. It snowed. My Katie-girl loves snow. She loves it’s cold. She loves to eat it. She loves to chase a well thrown snowball. She loves everything about snow.

I can’t stop smiling!

We went on several walks today, and explored the backyard too. While out there I grabbed some pictures because in the back of my mind I wonder if this is her last snowfall.

My yard is looking good!

Not that she looks like she’s going anywhere just yet. But will she still be here next November or December when winter closes in on us again? Probably not.

Yep, I’m a happy girl.

So for now I toss her a snowball. I watch her twirl in happiness. And I take pictures to save the moment.

Our girl.

Because each day is a gift, and I’ll want to unwrap this one again some day.

Enough pictures already, mama!

Author: dawnkinster

I'm a long time banker having worked in banks since the age of 17. I took a break when I turned 50 and went back to school. I graduated right when the economy took a turn for the worst and after a year of library work found myself unemployed. I was lucky that my previous bank employer wanted me back. So here I am again, a long time banker. Change is hard.

43 thoughts on “The gift of time

  1. ❤️❤️❤️ the gift of time, treasuring each moment! ❤️❤️❤️


  2. I always smile when I see Princess Katie The Khollie – and think of my own princess NAK –

    All of you are SO living the good life – and understand the balance of good and bad with a ‘mature’ khanine –

    Of coursek Katie understands that same balance with ‘mature humans’

    NAK’s Mom Phyll


  3. Each day is a gift… Glad that she is still happy 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You made me cry already. I don’t know what’s harder, having them go quickly or knowing each day might be the last. Glad she’s feeling good, eating and drinking is such a good sign. Wishing you many more memories together.


  5. So glad she is doing well and is happy! This is a wonderful post, but it did make my eyes start to drip. Shelties sure do love snow and Katie’s happiness shows.


    • I’m glad she got this last romp in the snow, though it wasn’t much of a romp. She did run in the snow at Thanksgiving, on her own, just for fun. I’m glad I got to see that too. I’ll remember and smile about it forever

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Such a sad, sweet post! Made me tearful to read this piece. Yes, enjoy the precious time you have left with dear, beautiful Katie.


  7. I don’t want to think about not having Katie. Keep snapping those pictures, Dawn. The little princess looks wonderful.


    • She does look wonderful, and she knows it too. I sometimes am surprised by the thought that our time is short. It just catches me at the oddest moments. I don’t like to think about not having her under my feet either. Sometimes when she’s sleeping in some other part of the house (which isn’t often, she likes to be right next to me most of the time) I think “this is what it will be like when she’s not here” and I get really really sad.


  8. Each day is a gift indeed (gulp) heart tug if a post and Katie looks so good in that snow she loves – glad she is happy !


  9. You are a beauty, Katie. Enjoy your snow.


  10. I am glad she’s doing well and seems to be so happy. It is so sad to see our dogs age but when you can do things that make them happy that is all that matters. I would blow up her best picture in a 16 x 20 size as a portrait for the wall.


  11. So sweet, Dawn. I love how you’re appreciating every single day with your Katie.


    • Most days anyway. Though there was this morning when she wouldn’t settle down until after 10 that I was a tiny bit frustrated. Then I remembered she’s not forever and I let her bug me until she decided I was boring and went to take a nap.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. It’s the bright eyes and smile that matter the most – the happy girl signs. Hugs


  13. So glad that you and Katie were given a magical snow day to make more precious memories. **hugs** 💕


  14. Katie is beautiful as always and happy to be alive, Dawn. When that day comes and it’s time for her to move on, she will be with you and be at peace. For now, you are blessing each other every day. Hugs to you both, from your fellow dog Mama.


  15. ❤ So glad to hear that Katie is still finding moments of joy in between her long naps. This time is truly special for both of you.


    • It is. It’s hard and special all at the same time. I know we are lucky to have had her for so many years, and sometimes it feels like she will of course live forever. She’s such a sturdy, tough, brave, feisty little girl.


  16. The last photo with her little pink tongue almost hanging out is my favorite of the bunch. I’m glad you two are having as much fun as possible.


  17. You take such good care of her, so glad she is stable for the moment. Enjoy everyday!


    • We do enjoy each other every day. She also enjoys her 5 small meals and her midnight treat and her medicine that tastes like bacon! We have a routine down now, when she gets what meals and what meds. She likes routine so she’s good with it all.


  18. She looks great and she appears happy. Our Frances slowed down a lot in her last year and we were surprised that she made it to 15. In the end she went down hill quickly. She was fine one day and the next she wasn’t. We miss her and think of her often. You will know when the end is near. In the meantime enjoy every day. She may live to see another winter. You never know.


    • I’m sorry about your girl Frances. It sure is hard to let them go, but you are right, we have discussed it (not when she could hear of course) and we will help her go when she is no longer having a good time. And yes, she may live to see another winter…she’s certainly marching right along at the moment!

      Liked by 1 person

  19. How much love, how so very much love, both ways.


    • Most of the time anyway! Right now she’s huffing at me because she wants to be outside. It’s freezing outside. We just came in, she did both jobs. She’s had both her breakfasts (2). Now I wish she’d take a nap!


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