Katie visited me in my dreams last night. I can’t remember the entire conversation, but I remember some, and the comfort her visit provided:
“Hey mama, I love you.”
“I know you do, baby-girl.”
Yea, but it seemed like maybe you needed to hear it.”
“Yes, I’ve been missing you something terrible.”
“I’ve noticed, mama. You’ve got to stop thinking about the day I crossed the bridge.”
“I know. But everywhere I look I remember you.”
“I’d think you’d be too busy with the new kid to spend much time missing me.”
“You’d think, right?”
“She seems like an OK kid, mama, but you can’t let her break all the rules, you know?”
“Like I did with you, huh?”
“Well, yea. Like you did with me. You’ve noticed she’s really smart, right?”
“Oh yes, we’ve noticed.”
“Well, she’s going to want to do lots of stuff, and some of it will be stuff you did with me and you can’t be crying all the time, OK? It’s not fair to the kid.”
“You’re right. I can’t be doing that. She deserves more from her mom.”
“She doesn’t call you mama?”
Nope, you’re the only one that calls me that. She calls me mom. But I’ll always be your mama.”
“I know mama. Always.”
“Always and forever, baby girl.”
“OK mama, now get going on the training…I watched that yellow flower photo shoot and frankly she’s got a lot to learn.”
“Awww give her a break, sweetie. She’s only 5 months old. She’ll figure it out once she stops putting everything into her mouth..”
“I know, mama. Well, I just wanted to stop by and tell you I love you. And to remind you to do right by the kid. I’m watching.”
Thanks, Katie-girl, it sure was nice of you to stop by.”
Penny here. I know you’ve heard from me a lot this month, but honestly, I’m the best thing mom and dad have going on right now, so I’m going to take advantage of that and get all the screen exposure I can! Cause I know things can change in an instant.
Gotta keep an eye out behind me, you never know what might sneak up on us.
Like for example…one moment I was playing with all my sisters at Mama S’s house and the next minute I was in a mom and dad’s arms and then in their car and then in my very own home!
Being aware of your surroundings is very important when you’re out in the world like this.
Sometimes I get to visit Mama S and my sister and my dog mom. That’s a lot of fun, and we play a whole bunch, but lately my mom and dad are taking me more places to explore. They say they’re exposing me to different sounds and smells, but mostly I think they just want to play.
That’s a pretty tree, mom, but you should be focusing all your attention on me.
Why last week mom took me to three parks! Three! I think she was trying to wear me out but that’s not going to happen. She said she didn’t want to waste the good weather, so we needed to go, go GO!
Sometimes mom has good ideas!
There could be something scary in this water!
The first park we visited was Independence Oaks. I’ve been there before, when mom met a friend there and we all went for a walk. But this time it was just us, and we were in a different part of the park.
I’m gonna break up this dangerous stick, OK mom?
I was a little uncertain for some reason that morning, not at all sure I wanted to be there. My mom is pretty observant and we didn’t stay too long. She says we’ll try again on a day when the park isn’t so busy.
Then on another day we went to a park I’ve never been to before! Mom said it was one of Katie’s favorites and that they used to camp here a lot.
I don’t know what camping is. Mom says that’s OK, when I’m a little older she’ll show me.
Is that another dog down there?
There was a big lake and mom took me down so I could smell the water. I think maybe I like water, but she wouldn’t let me go in. She said it was too cold.
I want to play IN the water, mom!
Too cold for a sheltie? I don’t know mom, I think it might be fun. Promise me you’ll let me wade later this summer, OK?
The lake looks pretty from up here, mom!
Then she said we were going to walk in the woods! I wasn’t at all sure I wanted to go into the woods!
I don’t know, mom. Are you sure?
There could be scary things in there!
I guess it’s not so bad in the woods.
On the other hand, it turned out that there were lots of wonderful smells in there! And mom let me smell all of them.
I practiced my sit. I even did a little staying. But not much.
It took us forever to do just a little bit of the trail that Katie and she used to walk all the time.
This is pretty cool, mom.
Eventually I got pretty comfortable in the woods, but there sure were a lot of smells and crazy sounds! And there was a boardwalk I didn’t like at all!
Nope! Not walking on this, mom!
Luckily mom scooped me up and carried me off the boardwalk. I was OK after that, but I was still glad to get back out into the open where I could make sure to protect mom from any scary woodland monsters.
So this place is full of people in the summer? Interesting.
Then, on another day mom took me to Springfield Oaks! I’d been there before, so I was cool with this park. It has a giant sledding hill that we climbed last time.
What’s that over there?
We walked around behind the sledding hill this time, so I could spend some time smelling at the edge of the woods. Lots of people walk their dogs there, so there was quite a bit of pee-mail for me to read.
We’re going to go up this hill, right mom?
But what I really wanted to do was run up that hill!
Mom said we didn’t have to, but I think that was just her not really wanting to go up it. I told her we needed to go up there to see what there was to see on the other side! After all, I’m an adventure-girl!
I posed a bunch for mom. I’m figuring out the modeling business can be very lucrative with treats.
But of course first mom had to take like a bajillion pictures. Katie warned me about her.
I even got to lay down on the job!
I decided I didn’t mind too much. The treats were good. But finally I dragged her the rest of the way up the hill and guess what? We could see a school bus and a whole bunch of kids down there!
Well what do you know, that looks fun!
I thought that was very interesting. Mom thought we should avoid them and go down the other side of the hill. So we did. And on our way down mom found these yellow flowers and got all excited.
Yellow flowers, mom? Really??!
She said something about Katie getting her picture taken every spring in the yellow flowers and I should sit there for her so she could get more pictures.
I guess if I can lay down I’ll let you take some pictures of me in the flowers.
Whatever mom.
Nom, nom, nom.
But wait! These are quite tasty! Another perk to being a model!
Mom said that was enough and it was time to go.
If I hide down here you can’t see me, right mom?
Sometimes mom has no sense of humor.
Anyway, those were my adventures in three parks last week! I don’t know how many more parks there are out there. I think Katie should have left me a map or a list or something. I guess I’ll just have to stay flexible and see what the folks have lined up for me next.
Oh yea, I forgot to tell you,I got dirt on my nose when I was in the woods!
I’m in puppy school with daddy, and that’s been kind of fun. So far they’re just doing stuff I mostly already know how to do, but I get lots of treats, so whatever, right?!
Time to sign off, this is way too long and I need my beauty sleep!
Friday I took myself to see Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. I read the book more than 50 years ago, and I just had to see the movie. Like most people I usually like the books better than the movies that are made based on them.
So you may ask? What about this one?
First let me set the stage. The movie theater I went to is at a mall, and I haven’t been to the mall in a very long time. I used to go each morning and walk around and around, looking at the windows, watching people, hardly ever buying anything. In fact, I don’t remember the last time I bought anything at the mall. Which makes me wonder how they survive.
There’s a Leggo Land and a SeaWorld type thing and even something experiential that involves a pig named Pippa at the mall these days. I don’t get it.
It felt like a parallel universe when I walked inside on a Friday afternoon. Lots of people, most of them with little kids were walking around. It was noisy in a way I don’t remember. Teens wandering, which seemed odd on a school day. But frankly I have no sense of age, so maybe these were young adults, long out of high school.
I was early, so I walked part way around the mall, noting stores that were new, the loss of stores that used to be. OK. Let’s be honest. I walked part way around the mall to use the restroom.
I’m that age now.
Anyway, eventually I made my way back to the theater and stood in a short line to buy tickets. Everyone in line was an older woman. My age, actually.
The young man selling the tickets was slightly overweight, scraggly beard, a bit of a mustache, greasy hair. When I asked for a ticket to Are You There God, he smiled and said he remembered when he was a young girl growing up in the 70s always giggling with his friends about boys.
That set me back a moment.
I didn’t want to be judgmental, or reactionary, or inappropriate so I just smiled and nodded as I waited for my ticket. I took a second glance at him, trying to figure out if he was once a girl. Maybe. But then he started to laugh, and I was startled out of my musings. Just kidding he said, and I smiled and took my ticket and said, well, you never know…and he said no you don’t and I went to find my assigned seat.
And hours later I thought….You’re an idiot, he was much too young to be anything in the 70s! Why would you focus only on the fact he said he was a girl and not see how unreasonable the whole scenario was?
Anyway. The movie.
I thought the movie was marvelous. I don’t know how long it was because I never once checked my watch, which is something I almost always do in movies. I have such a short attention span. I smiled to myself through almost all of it. It was a gentle, sweet, thought provoking movie. I recommend it.
If you’re a woman of a certain age you probably read the book. Even if you haven’t, you should take yourself to this movie.
Tonight I watched a tape of an interview of Judy Blume on the Tonight Show. It’s short….take the time and see what she thinks about her book being made into a movie 50+ years after she wrote it.
I guess growing up in the 70s wasn’t so bad, even if the hairstyles and clothes were. Go see the movie and be reminded.
Katie here. Yes, I’m still around, someone’s got to supervise the little one, and who better than me, right? After all, I had a hand paw in finding her for mama and daddy, so I keep tabs on her just to make sure she’s following the rules I set up for the household more than fifteen years ago.
Piggy!My favorite tunnel toy!
But I can see that I might have to remind some of you that there is nothing new on earth. All the games that little Miss Penny has ‘invented’ I thought of first.
Penny’s favorite tunnel toy is Blue!
Yep. I heard mama tell the little one that I was the beautiful one, but she’s the smart one. Well. Let me remind you all that I outsmarted mama lots of times. And I have the stories to prove it.
I was also much more patient with mama and the camera than little Penny is.
But today let me share with you that mama kind of teared up the first time she tossed a toy in the tunnel and smartie-pants ran through the tunnel and brought it back.
Way to go little Penny!
Because, you see, that was one of my all time favorite games. And Penny plays it just like I did, even though mama and daddy didn’t teach her.
Piggy in the tunnel!
Well of course they didn’t. I have a direct line to Penny’s little brain and I’m always guiding her. So the next time you all think she’s so smart just remember where she gets it from. Yep, I’m never far away.
And please note that I posed on that spiral in the park first. Just saying.
I was there first.
Now go get mama a tissue, her eyes are leaking all over again.
When I left you last I was sitting on a bench, feeling defeated having walked a couple miles through the Refuge looking for great images and feeling as though I had missed the mark. I was tired and hungry and, slumped on a bench, was eating an apple when suddenly a bird flew low and fast, just missing my head, and landing somewhere behind me.
“Don’t call me a Red-bellied, lady!”
I didn’t know what it was, I thought maybe a Red-bellied Woodpecker, as those have been known to divebomb me during spring walks at Kensington. I grabbed the camera from the bench and got a couple of shots. Whatever it was was extremely noisy, but I couldn’t tell from the image in the viewfinder just what it was.
It was only after I got home and did some research that I knew there was such a thing as a Yellow-bellied Sapsucker. So cool! This image is better than I thought it would be, and though not perfect, you can see the yellow and red on the bird.
From earlier in my walk.
I think I was very lucky to see two of these guys that day!
And then, then…..just as I was putting the camera back down a flash of something caught my eye back cross the trail. I heard the sound of wings and something landing in a bush just over there. Could it be? Even though it was mostly hidden behind the branches I was thrilled to see an Eastern Towhee!
What’s that back there?
I clicked off some shots, praying I had the bird in focus and not just the branches in front. Either way I was happy just to see him.
I rarely see this bird at home, I think in the 30+ years I’ve lived where we are now I’ve seen a Towhee twice. They’re supposed to be here in Michigan all summer but they’re rare in my world. I was thrilled to see him, even if I didn’t get a better look.
And then, as if he was reading my mind, he hopped out onto a branch and stared at me.
“What are you looking at, lady?”
He sat out there for a long time. I was shooting as fast as I could. He gave me a good look at both sides of his profile…
“Make sure you get my good side. Oh wait. Both sides are good sides!”
… and then he got bored with the whole model for hire thing and flew off for parts unknown.
“Well, that’s enough of that! Does she think I work for free??”
I looked at the images I had captured and tried not to squeal. This bird, this one little bird made my entire day. All the walking and lugging the heavy camera equipment, all the missed opportunities and focus issues, all the aches and pains were worth it for this one experience.
This is my favorite crop of him, including the graceful curve of the greening branches.
And, after a bit of reflection and giggling, I picked myself up and wandered happily down the trail, where I eventually found another bench and thought I’d try my luck and sit there for a moment or three, just to see what might stop by.
“Lots of people overlook us sparrows, but we’re pretty cute if you just spend some time with us!”
And this little guy, perhaps a swamp sparrow, graced me with his presence. I liked his (or her?) butch haircut on top. He didn’t stay long, so I moved along too. It was getting late and I wondered if the cinnamon teal was still in the pond back at the parking lot.
I was almost back to the parking lot when I saw this pretty mourning dove sunning.
“I know I’m beautiful.”
He or she wasn’t shy about showing off subtle colors in the afternoon sun. I appreciated the display and moved on toward the car.
I was almost back on the main drive when I noticed these two killdeer standing together in the road.
“Hey lady, we could use some privacy if you know what I mean?”
And then I realized they weren’t exactly innocently standing there.
“Geeze lady, give us a break!”
But rather they were enjoying a little afternoon delight. He seemed pretty happy and let me get one last shot. She was out of there, totally embarrassed.
“Hey! I get a cut of any profits you get selling my image…right?”
And when I finally got back to the parking lot and the pond? Nope, no cinnamon teal to be seen, but the turtles were fun.
“Those birding people have mostly gone home, thank goodness. We could use a little peace around here.”
And I met a wonderful nature photographer who happened to be up on the viewing platform looking for the teal too. We had a nice conversation and I told her where the towhee was and she headed off into the woods.
“Those photographers will follow you anywhere!”
I headed home, exhausted but oh oh so happy. And that, dear readers, is the end of this story.
An hour north of me is another magical place. I keep track of it on Facebook, where people, dedicated to photographing the wonders there post images and after periods of time away I am always itching to go back and see for myself.
I always try to arrive before sunrise, to witness the Shiawasee National Wildlife Refuge waking up. Sometimes it’s very noisy, but last Friday it was quiet, no flocks of cranes flying over, just some little birds and a couple swans.
Waiting for sunrise.
But the moon was coming up and that kept me company as I waited for daylight. I was there to see the cinnamon teal I’d been hearing about. A bird that doesn’t frequent our part of the country had been sighted regularly, in a pond right next to the parking lot.
Absolutely beautiful moonrise, big and golden, it came up just ahead of the sun.
Just as the sun rose a car roared into the parking lot, and a woman, dressed in waders and lugging a camera with a huge lens eased her way into the water beneath the viewing platform. I was still in the car.
Ummmm….what would this angle afford that standing on the viewing platform wouldn’t?
As the light brightened I figured if she was that prepared I didn’t want to disturb her or any potential shots, and I avoided the viewing platform in favor of the parking lot itself. And guess what? The cinnamon teal was there, with his lady friend.
Yep he’s out there, and not that far away from where the woman was standing.
But the light was still low and I was far away. Still…I have proof that I saw him and that was enough for me. I left her to her project and started down the road to the trails, intent on what other wonders I could see.
He really was beautiful.
There was this female merganser swimming all by herself in the ditch along the road. I wondered where her mate was.
Sometimes a girl just needs some alone time.
And this killdeer was be-bopping along in the wet grasses. He didn’t really want his picture taken but I got what I could.
If I hide behind this piece of grass she won’t see me.
Mostly I was just happy to be out there in the golden early morning light. But I kept thinking about that teal…and when another car pulled in and a guy clompped his way up the viewing platform I figured I had as much right to be there as either of them and I walked back, tiptoed up the viewing platform and saw that the teal, and his lady were nowhere to be found.
She’s still under there, and he’s stomping around up top. People…sigh…
I wasn’t surprised, with all the commotion. So I took a couple pictures and walked on back down the road. I was kind of disappointed that I didn’t have a clear shot of the teal. But I had a couple of tree swallows dive bomb me. They were so fast I didn’t get a good focus, but it was kind of cool.
People are kind of overbearing, don’t you think Harvey?
I resigned myself to the fact I might only get images of common birds, like robins who seems to pose for me as if to say they were tired of being overlooked.
Say lady! I’m sort of cinnamon colored!
And there was this little bird, that was cute, but I couldn’t tell in the low light what he or she was. I figured a sparrow and I wasn’t too excited. When I got home and began to process the photos I realized it was a phoebe with nesting material! What a cutie! But at the time I was feeling sort of sad.
I know I just look like a little brown bird, lady, but I’m really cute!
I trucked on, stopping when I heard something, looking for opportunities. I talked to a birder who was walking behind me for quite awhile. He said he was out there to see deer and eagles. I assured him he’d see eagles near the back of the trail, and there had been deer earlier, by the parking lot.
What’s that over there?
Just after he left me I noticed these guys in a field to my left. I wonder if the birder noticed them at all.
Shhhhh, don’t tell him.
I moved slowly down the path. If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that when I’m walking I don’t see much, but the wildlife sees me. I’ve missed lots of opportunities by moving around too much. And by changing lenses.
No wildlife here. I just liked the colors.
I almost always think I have the wrong lens, and plenty of times on this walk I wished I didn’t have my long lens on the camera, but this hike I was determined to use one lens and stop often.
In the end I think it worked out.
Not in focus, but he was flying directly at my lens, so I just instinctively pushed the shutter. Kind of cool.
I noticed this little bird hopping along a big limb. Turns out, though I couldn’t tell at the time, that it’s a cute little junco. You can tell it from the phoebe by it’s pinkish bill. They should be migrating further north any time now.
He definitely wanted his picture taken.
As I moved closer to the back of the trail I concentrated more on the beautiful reflections in the still water.
Not everything beautiful here comes with wings or fur.
And the angles of the light and trees as another birder passes me looking for anything interesting.
What’s that up there?
About then I heard what I thought was a woodpecker right above my head. Well darn it, I thought, so far I haven’t gotten images of much of anything…where IS this woodpecker? And then…there he was.
Not a hairy woodpecker.
I thought maybe he was a hairy woodpecker, he was bigger than a downy, but it was hard to tell. Guess what? When I got home, and after looking at some other photographers’ work, people out there the same day, it turns out this is a yellow bellied sap sucker! I don’t think I’ve ever seen one before. Or if I have, I didn’t realize what it was.
So exciting. Still, while I was out there I didn’t know what I had and I was still pretty discouraged. I trudged on, out to the eagle’s nest. I figured I’d at least see an eagle or two or three…and yes, way off in the distance, in a massive nest was one eagle, mostly cleaning the nest with his or her back to me. Hardly anything to look at.
Yep, there’s an eagle in there, tending to the nest.
But there’s a bench out there and I was tired so I sat and watched the swans chase each other around in the water just past the eagle’s nest.
Lots of angst, all in the name of love.
There seemed to be quite a rivalry going on. The light was still low and they were far away and I was having the hardest time getting a focus, but I tried.
And in between the swan shots I’d check the eagle. Finally I could see the adult eagle more clearly and I got the best shot I could.
…where I met another birder coming the other way. He told me that there were lots of little birds on the next section of trail. Kinglets, thrush, swamp sparrows, towhees, just lots of little birds.
He says he lives just down the road and does this walk almost every day. Lucky guy.
Great I thought, I’m having trouble getting BIG birds in focus, and I’ve never been very good at getting the littles. Those guys never hold still.
Plus, did I tell you that Thursday evening my husband and I, with the help of a neighbor and his tractor with a frontend loader, moved 30 yards of mulch? I was a little sore and a lot tired and I was double thinking even being out at the Refuge, much less walking the four mile loop. Especially when all I had so far was a bunch of out of focus bird shots.
Kinda like this one.
Or so I thought.
So I trudged on along the water, then turned to head back south for the last mile and a half to the car. I was starving. My back was tired. My eyes hurt from straining while looking through the viewfinder.
But there was a mama goose, all curled up on her nest. How pretty. How peaceful.
I’m watching you lady.
And there, up ahead was a bench. And I had an apple and a bottle of water in my camera backpack. I gratefully slid the backpack off and sat down. The camera sat on the bench beside me, backpack at my feet and I munched the best ever apple and contemplated my day.
No matter what it was still spring and the sky was blue and the trees were in bloom and the birds were singing.
I was still glad to be out there, but I was tired. I didn’t really think I’d see any little birds. I was pretty unhappy with the cinnamon teal image, the eagle image, the combating swan images. I didn’t know I had a phoebe or a junco or anything else.
But the apple tasted really, really good.
I could always call them artsy-fartsy images….right?
And the blue sky and warm sun made me smile too. Would it be enough, just sitting in this beautiful place? Or would I ultimately be disappointed by my hike through a Michigan wonderland?
It began, as these things often do, during an early morning wander with the puppy in the back yard.
My first glimpse from across the yard.
What was that flash of blue I caught out of the corner of my eye?
My wife likes these fixer-uppers. Personally I’d rather have a move-in-ready place.
Why look at that, a bluebird, shining in the early morning light, claiming ownership of an old bluebird house out near the road.
But you know how it is….happy wife, happy life. Right?
I hurried back to the house, got the camera and long lens, and tiptoed out onto the deck.
And besides, she says she’s going to do all the work, so whatever.
I got to watch for awhile as she worked hard to get new nesting material into the old box.
I told her the renovations were going to cost more than just buying a nicer place. But she insisted this one felt like home.
The story unfolds in pictures.
Things in the renovation zone are too noisy for me. I’m going to sit over here for awhile.Might as well take this personal time to spiff myself up. Maybe I can get a date night tonight, know what I mean?But wait. Maybe I need to woo her a little bit. After all she’s been working pretty hard all day.I don’t know where he is. Just like him to fly off when there’s work to be done.Best to just do it yourself, I always say.Just a few more accessories and it will be perfect.Hmmm….I should have measured the door before I brought this back. If I just push a little harder…Man, that was tough. But a woman’s work is never done, and this will all be worth it in the end!I’m so excited about this place. We got it for such a great price!OK! I found her a succulent insect, her favorite. Now where is she?Is she in here?Honey?I don’t get it. Where could she be?She’s got to be around here somewhere.I got her this great treat and she’s not even here!This bug is going to go stale if she doesn’t eat it soon. I don’t think she appreciates my efforts.Women! I’m going to go hang out with the guys down at the bar.
Change Is Hard 