Uncategorized | Change Is Hard

August 4, 2013
by dawnkinster 15 Comments

Looking for red

Katie and I were weeding on Saturday. It was a beautiful day and Katie was in full supervisory mode.

Don’t bother me Mama, I’m busy watching the neighbors.

As I moved down the bed I was suddenly buzzed by a female hummingbird. Then she began to work the red beebalm just down the garden from where I was working. I thought to myself…what a great shot that would be. But of course the camera was in the house. So I went to get it and naturally the bird was gone when I got back.

I put the camera on the house generator, to keep it safe from dirt and weeds and began to work again. I had my head buried in the beebalm, pulling out a massive nightshade plant when I was buzzed again by you know who. I lifted my head and we had a stare down. She won. I went to get the camera and she left.

So here’s a picture of beebalm. Pretend you see a female humming bird there, will you?

Hummer breakfast

I continued on down the bed, pulling grass and weeds. I began to realize there was a lot of red stuff in bloom right now. These are particularly beautiful this year. I can’t remember their name but I bet some of you know it!

Beautiful

And there are a couple of surprises too. Buried deep in the leftover bleeding heart and behind some coneflower is a red dahlia in bloom. I must have planted it there this spring, but had forgotten. It’s the first dahlia to bloom this year and I might have missed it without Katie insisting I weed.

Hiding in plain sight

And way down at the other end of the garden is one solitary gladiola. I planted the bulbs 3 years ago and I’m supposed to pull them up each fall and replant each spring. Well. That never happened…but this courageous glad just keeps coming back.

Spiky red

The weeding yesterday was oddly relaxing. And I appreciated all the red, a color the camera shy Ms. Hummingbird loves as well. In fact I bet she’s out there right now enjoying my garden. I hope so. I sort of had her in mind when I planted it.

Of course there were other colors and other visitors as well. I almost stepped on this little guy. Do you see him?

Blending in

And there were lots of these guys in the garden too.

Resting

All in all a nice day to be outside. Even if it was just to weed. Katie and I will be weeding other beds today. She’s pretty excited at the prospect; she’s napping now to gather strength for her supervisory role. It’s a hard job but somebody has to make sure this work gets done!

We hope you all have a wonderful Sunday! Get out and enjoy everything the summer has to offer. I think we’ll plan a little park time today as well. Katie will have earned it.

Did somebody say PARK?!

August 3, 2013
by dawnkinster 20 Comments

Funny

Funny how it happens.

You’re going along in your life, handling stuff, feeling like you’ve moved past the sad place. You’ve written some about truck stuff and felt strong doing it. You spent an evening talking to a young woman whose mother was killed by a truck a year ago and you were glad to give her an outlet, help her plan some of her new and unexpected future. You felt good about being able to listen objectively with less personal emotion.

Missing them.

Yet this morning you feel a little off. The dog gets you up early, before light, and as you stumble into clothes to take her out, wander through the house to get a jacket, it occurs to you that the house was being remodeled the last time your Dad was here and that he never got to see the fireplace. Why not just send him an email with a photo attached you reason. Seems like a sensible thing to do.

And then you find yourself in the driveway staring up at a beautiful moon sitting low in the sky, beside a bright planet off to the north. And you realize that the moon is not blurry because of sleep in your eyes but because you are staring through a sheen of tears. There’s no email in heaven. Is there.

As you and the dog wander you contemplate the long road of life and how you don’t know what’s over the next hill. You are lost in thought, memories.

Long road.

Then just overhead a cardinal begins his morning song and you can just see him through the soft morning light. He flies right over your head, still singing and you figure it’s Dad cheering you up. It works as you realize you’re not in the dark place. This place, this morning, is more a gentle blue place with shadows around the edges. Soft, not scary.

And then your dog stares up at you with big eyes, wondering, and grins because you do and the two of you hustle back to the house for breakfast.

Funny how it happens.

Love you Mama

August 1, 2013
by dawnkinster 13 Comments

Need some help here

There’s been a lot going on in Washington that has potential to make traveling on some of our roads even more scary. I know, it’s hard to believe things are actually happening in DC, but it’s true.

As most of you know I volunteer for the Truck Safety Coalition. One of the things the group does is monitor Congress, looking for attempts from some organizations and lobbyists to get around the safety regulations, to gain exceptions in order to get heavier or larger trucks on the roads. The American Trucking Association (ATA) is always looking for ways to make more profits and they don’t much care who ends up paying. And in the end, bigger, heavier trucks cost all of us; some of us pay with our lives or the lives of our loved ones, but everyone pays with taxes used to repair the roads and bridges that heavier and larger trucks damage.

So lately there’s been a push for exemptions for heavier trucks in some states. The House has already passed a bill that allows heavier trucks on some Wisconsin highways. Now there is a similar bill in the Senate. It’s S 1299 and it’s up for discussion right now. They’re going to try to get it to pass by consent. I guess this means that if no one objects the bill will pass. It will allow heavier trucks on federal highways in Wisconsin. If the Senate passes it’s bill and the House already has a bill it’s only a matter of time, and not much time, before heavier trucks will be rolling on federal highways in Wisconsin.

You might wonder why I care about what happens in Wisconsin. After all I don’t live there. You probably don’t either. So why care what they do? I care because this is the way the ATA works. They get an exemption here, an exemption there. Pretty soon the rules are no longer consistent on federal highways between states. Then they pressure states who haven’t increased weights to go along with the plan in order to be competitive and keep business in their state. You can guarantee that once weights are increased in WIsconsin the ATA will be moving on to a state near you. Maybe even your state.

80% of Americans are opposed to heavier trucks. In my experience politicians will tell you they are against heavier trucks in their jurisdictions too. But when it comes right down to it, the trucking industry has money. A lot of money. And money talks. No one is talking about the other side of this issue — the cost to regular people like you and me.

So you can help. Call your Senators. Ask them to object to the Baldwin/ Johnson Senate Bill 1299. Remind them that even though this is in Wisconsin it’s a FEDERAL highway, so it’s relevant to all of us. We only need one Senator to object and they won’t have their consensus. Maybe it will be your Senator that makes the difference, your Senator that is brave enough to stand up for what is right, maybe it will be your Senator that will put safety before profits.

Please call 202-224-3121 and ask for your Senator. (You each have two Senators…please call them both if you can!) You can leave a message with a real person. It only takes a minute. Your vote counts. You count. If we all call our Senators tomorrow (Friday 8/2) one of them is BOUND to object to this bill.

We can do this, but I need your help. Lots of people thank you for all your support.

I do too.

July 31, 2013
by dawnkinster 12 Comments

Wordless Wednesday

July 28, 2013
by dawnkinster 17 Comments

Another six done

I never got around to blogging about last Sunday’s six mile run/walk. It was a long story and I shared it with my online running group so I guess it’s validated that way. I got in a couple more 3 milers after work this week. I’m still having trouble with my feet; the arches ache so much when I begin and it’s not till mile 2 is done that I get much relief so it’s a challenge to make myself keep trying. But I have a goal. I’d really like to do the 10 mile Crim race at the end of August. Yes. This August. I used to run it every year and I haven’t been able to in the past three years or so. So I keep getting out there. Keep hoping.

Do you want to hear about my six miler this morning? I went a route I haven’t been for a couple of years. Figured it would be fun to see what had changed. In the end though I wasn’t really paying attention to the views, it was more about listening to my body, figuring out what hurts and what doesn’t and why.

The best, perhaps biggest news? My feet didn’t start out hurting! Maybe I’m over the hump with that. Instead of aching arches during my first mile I had the normal twinges; ankles, shins, knee. I felt like a runner! In fact I ran a whole 1/2 mile without stopping, I was so happy about the way my feet felt. I think that’s the longest I’ve run in 4 years. Yes when I stopped running and began a walk break I could still feel those pesky arches, but it was more a general fatigue, not a dibilitating ache. So I’m very very pleased.

Once I settled into the run I enjoyed the fact it was darn cold out. It’s in the 50’s here, which is perfect for running. Plus there was a lovely little breeze. We’ve had lots of rain so my dirt road was soft and there was virtually no traffic. Perfect. I had lots of time to think.

I thought about my parents a lot. Not the overwhelming grief of years past, just noticing a little flower Mom would have liked, or the new construction house that would have interested Dad. It’s been nine years now and I’ve mostly moved out of that dark place. For example I ran into an acquaintance couple this week. They told me it had been a rough year for them; his father became ill and died, her mother died too. I listened to their story and offered my comfort and condolences without diluting their pain with my own story. They’ve never heard mine, and likely never will. I’ve learned over the years the benefit of sharing a painful story, how the telling eases the pain. And I can listen now and offer support without having to share my own. It’s a good place to be.

In between thinking about my folks I convinced my self to run to the next sign, the next mailbox, the next corner. I made a rule to always run to the next red thing. Thank goodness there weren’t many red things on my route, just two mailboxes and a porta-potty in front of the new build. So that was six mandatory runs on my out and back 3 miles. Plus lots and lots more.

At one point I thought I’d run to the street sign. But as I got closer to it something in my mind suggested to go past it to that mailbox up there. “But that’s a long way! And it’s uphill!” “Yes, yes it it.” “Well OK then.” Once my mind got away with pushing me like that it tried to do it on every bit of every run segment. “How about to that mailbox?” “How about to the one AFTER that mailbox?” “Now STOP that!” “Only after you get past that street sign.” “Well OK then.”

I turned west at the end of mile 5, coming out of the dark wet green of the woods into the open next to a golf course. I saw dark black clouds and heard distant thunder. I still had a mile to go. Well OK then. Starting up the last mile, the last long hill I could see rain beginning near the top. The breeze picked up. I picked up my speed too. At the top of the hill I turned into my subdivision, back onto paved roads. I slowed and watched the way the misty raindrops made yesterday’s puddles dance. Pretty. Maybe this was just God’s way of providing a giant mister, like they do at the end of a long race, to cool me down. Well OK then.

I lifted my sweaty face into the mist and smiled. Another six done. I beat my time from last Sunday’s hilly six. And though I didn’t feel like I wanted to do any more miles right at the moment, I also didn’t feel like I couldn’t. My feet didn’t hurt as much as they have on previous runs. My legs are just typically fatigued. The 10 mile Crim race just might be doable.

Well OK then.

July 27, 2013
by dawnkinster 12 Comments

Park days

The weather has been wonderful this past week; cooler with high temperatures in the 80’s (21’s C) and less humidity. Katie and I took advantage of that one evening after work and went to her favorite park.

Just sitting with my Mama.

I took my book, thinking I could sit on the hillside and read, and she could explore while on her long line. For a little bit she sat with me. Then she went and stood at the end of her long line, facing the walking trail. She didn’t cry, she didn’t tug. She just stood there and waited. She made me feel bad. After all what is the point of going to the park if you aren’t going to go for a walk?

OK little one.

So we went for a long walk, all the way around. Then because it was beautiful out we took a side trail over to the library and meandered up the library driveway back to another entrance to the park. I figured we’d head back to the car and go home.

Mama…I always have to wait for her.

But as we approached the park entrance we saw a car we recognized enter the park and drive way over to the parking lot. We were quite a ways away but we picked up our pace. Still, by the time we got to the parking lot they were already unloaded and out of sight down the walking path.

So we hustled along and eventually caught up with Maddie, a miniature Australian Shepard and her folks. Katie and I met Maddie when we were all in an agility class together a few years ago. We learned then that we lived in the same town and went to the same park but we hardly ever run into them. It’s been a couple years since we saw them last.

So of course we had to go on the walk with them, all the way around the park again. Katie thought she was in heaven to get to do the walk again! Though she slowed down some near the end. After all she’d already had a long walk.

Maddie is just full of energy, and ran circles around Katie. At one point, though, Katie did a play bow with Maddie and sort of leaped into the play. For a moment. Then she remembered she is a princess and stopped. I think if they saw each other more often and were left to it they might actually play together.

Katie and Maddie

Aren’t they cute? We hope we run into them again this summer!

Evening with Katie

July 26, 2013
by dawnkinster 8 Comments

No respect

I woke this morning to the news that someone has vandalized the Lincoln Memorial in Washington DC.

Mr. Lincoln

One of the beautiful things about our monuments is that you can visit around the clock. Wandering them late on a warm summer night, when they are all lit up, when they are quiet without the hundreds of tourists, is a gift. Perhaps it’s a gift we won’t always have.

Climbing to meet an important man.

All I can say to the person or people responsible is this: If you don’t have any respect for yourselves at least have respect for your own history.

Number 16

July 24, 2013
by dawnkinster 13 Comments

The compelling reason to visit Michigan

Scott wonders what about summer around here might compel a person to visit. So he asked us to show him.

Well here is the reason you should visit northern Michigan.

A visit provides the opportunity to relax your shoulders, loosen the kinks in your neck.

You can empty your mind. Or fill it with fresh new thoughts if you’d rather.

Relax

There’s nothing like the peace of sitting in the sand as the sun goes down…

Light.

…watching the light dance and change as your mind rests.

Come visit northern Michigan.

And let it renew your soul.

Sigh.

July 22, 2013
by dawnkinster 10 Comments

We got a package!

Pretty sheltie

Look what came in the mail today!

Katie, of course, was very interested, because her boyfriend, Reilly, tucked a special gift for her in among the bag that his Mom made for me. In fact she was very interested in the whole package. I think she knows Reilly is smitten. She kind of likes him too.

Two pretty shelties.

Isn’t the bag beautiful! It’s got pattern, slightly different, on each side. I’m going to use it to haul stuff to and from work. It’s perfect! All you dog lovers out there should look at Bree’s website. She’s so talented!

Thank you Bree! And Reilly too. Katie sends kisses!

Yummy! And all for ME!

July 21, 2013
by dawnkinster 11 Comments

Nope. Not compelling.

Saturday I worked on Scott’s photo challenge. He wants to see something compelling about summer in our hometown or state. I think it’s the word compelling that is intimidating me. To go and create a photo that would compel you, my loyal readers, to book travel in my state is a big proposition. Yet I know there is so much here in Michigan that you would love to see.

For many of us down near the city summer means going ‘up north.’ We pack up family and toys and jam our freeways heading north.

Two bikes, two kayaks.

So Saturday afternoon I packed my camera and headed north too. Oh I knew I wouldn’t have time to make it to my favorite places, but I thought I’d see how far I got and then I’d augment with photos from my archives.

I got as far as Frankenmuth, a little German town infused with flowers, tourists…

Shopping!

….and famous chicken dinners.

Can’t stop in Frankenmuth without a chicken dinner!

You can buy German cheese….

Everyone needs a little cheese.

….or sausage…

Doesn’t everyone have a sausage store in town?

…or stop at Bronners where it’s Christmas all year round.

Ho ho ho!

Then while traveling cross country I got sucked into my favorite thing to photograph up there.

Wide open spaces.

Barns.

I’m a country girl at heart.

So I didn’t get any further north, never got to show you Sleeping Bear Dunes.

Nothing but sand and sky.

Or Lake Michigan.

Water as far as you can see.

Or Mackinaw Island where all motor transportation is banned and horses haul everything.

Working like horses.

Nope. Didn’t find that compelling photograph that will make you want to come visit. But I’m going to rummage through those archives and find something.

Just wait and see.

Come along with me!

Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.

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