Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.


11 Comments

Sunshine on my shoulders!

Welcome to my park!

Welcome to my park!

Katie here!  Guess what?  The sun came out today and I got to go to my park.  Hey!  Do you think there is a correlation?   Mama said “Hey Katie!  It’s nice outside, do you want to go to the PARK?”  Well of course I did…so I got all jumpy and excited and barkey and she could hardly get me into the car.  Then I barked all the way there.  I was telling her to hurry up!

No one was at the park except a couple of little league teams.  They were all busy playing ball so we had the rest of the park to ourselves.

Play ball!

Play ball!

We were almost at the back of the park when I heard a loud noise and the earth started shaking.  Mama said it was a train, but I think it was a really really big car!  It has never been back there when we’ve been at my park before.  I stood stock still and watched it go by.

That's a BIG car!

That’s a BIG car!

When Mama asked me if I wanted to get closer I sat down.  No way!  I’ll wait right here Mama!

I'll wait right here.

I’ll wait right here.

After the big car was gone I was quite happy to continue our walk.  We came to the only wet spot on our walk and Mama walked right by it on the edge.  I stopped.  Mama got on the other side and looked back and called me.  No way!  She forgets all the time that I’m  a princess.  Princesses do not get their feet wet.  I made her come back and carry me over.  You’d think she’d have thought of that first.  Geeze.

Are your feet wet Mama?

Are your feet wet Mama?

Anyway, I had a great time and wish my Mama was home all the time to take me to the park every day.  Oh wait.  I forgot.  Mama brought ‘treats’ because she wanted to work on our heeling.  She brought dry dog food!  Can you believe that?  I came and sat once when she asked me and she gave me a piece.  I was disgusted and spit it out.  Honestly.  Sometimes she is not very smart.  If she had brought chicken I’m sure I would have run through that puddle.

Mama’s got a lot of learning to do.

Come ON Mama!

Come ON Mama!


21 Comments

The colors of our world

Karma has challenged us once again.  This time she wonders what colors we are drawn to.  I love all color so it’s going to be hard to choose.  Plus I like to find new photos for Karma’s challenges…and currently the world in Michigan is pretty much grey and brown.

Hmmm…wonder what I’ll end up doing.  It’s not due till the 28th so there’s lots of time!  There is time for you to share the colors of your world too!

Say….what colors do you see in the clouds floating overhead today?

Sunshine arrives.  Finally.

Sunshine arrives. Finally.

Maybe there really is some color out there besides gray and brown.


15 Comments

Running

As we watch the live coverage coming from the Boston area tonight – the speculation about whether the younger suspect in the Boston Marathon bombing is holed up in a boat in the back yard of a home – I read my emails.  A  friend is running a half marathon this Sunday.  She says she is feeling some anxiety; ripples of the Monday bombing.

Imported Photos 00111 (Small)

Ironically Monday morning, while runners, family members and the community were making plans to enjoy the iconic Boston Marathon I was meeting with a foot specialist in Grand Rapids in an attempt to get my running feet back.  I miss the running community.  I miss running with friends, talking along the way, listening to each others ups and downs, giving and getting support.  I miss the sense of accomplishment felt after a good run.  I miss the applause at a finish line.  I miss that part of my life.

I hope those that ran Boston, especially those whose family members were injured or killed, don’t give up running.  In times of stress it can be a comfort, and certainly the running community is supportive of its members.  If you’re a runner one of the best ways to deal with trouble is to run.  Sometimes solutions to seemingly insurmountable problems are worked out on a long run.  Sometimes running allows you space to recognize that things are not so bad.  And sometimes running is just an escape for a little bit.

For my friend running her half this Sunday…I send cyber hugs and reassurances that nerves before a race are always a bit frayed…and it’s normal to feel some extra stress this time.  I know she will do great.  She always does.  In fact when I’m almost 70, as she is, I hope I’ll be running just like her.

If I can get my feet fixed and get myself out the door I think I will.


12 Comments

Attack of the robins!

Gotta watch out for crazy birds!

Gotta watch out for crazy birds!

Katie and I were outside this morning, just as the sun was coming up.  She was sniffing around looking for the perfect place when from across the street two robins flew up from the lawn, flapping their wings and screeching at each other.  Up and down they flew, chest against chest, then they began chasing each other in larger and larger circles still screeching.   Soon other robins entered the fray, and they all began swooping and diving in a frantic dance.  The swarm of robins burst across the road, diving around our heads, then spun around a tree, then flew back across the road where they all dissipated, each to a separate tree except for two who ended up on the lawn where it all began.

Katie and I looked at each other.  “Well that was weird” I said.   She nodded and finished up what we were out there to do.   We headed inside for breakfast.

Morning peace was restored.


15 Comments

It’s raining here

Three killdeer

Three killdeer

I feel like I’ve moved to the Pacific Northwest.  It’s raining here.  Every day we wake up to 35 degrees (1.6 C) and mist.  Or 35 degrees and rain.   It rains off and on all day and all night.  We haven’t seen the sun in so long I’ve forgotten what it looks like.  I have faint memories of walks in the park under a warm sun, but my most recent memories of the park are walking through slush in my winter coat, wearing gloves and telling Katie to hurry up!

Today it’s overcast and 35 degrees.  The week long forecast holds a little hope of warmer temperatures but looks like rain every day.  I guess we can dream.  I have an adventure brewing that would be nicer if the temperatures were above freezing.   And if it doesn’t rain on me that would be extra special.  On the other hand all this rain could be snow, like my friends up north are experiencing. And Duluth Minnesota just got 7 inches of snow with more coming tomorrow.

Maybe I’ll just sit down and be quiet.


17 Comments

Trucks…here’s something you can do.

I’m watching the news today as it covers the people of Sandy Hook in DC lobbying for increased gun control.  I listen to the husband of one of the adults killed as he talks about the flight to DC on air-force one; how the entire flight he wished he was home with his wife watching her dance while she made dinner.   I see a clip of family members in a Senator’s office clutching tissue and trying to present their stories.  My own eyes tear up because I know.

From deep inside my soul I know how they feel.  How incredulous they are to be in the places they are now.  And  I know how they experience these amazing events – they experience it all through the mist of grief.  I remember sitting at a boardroom table, next to the Secretary of Transportation, across the table from Ralph Nader.  I remember the out of body experience as I talked to Dad in my head, unable to believe where I was, what I was doing.

Imagine flying on the President’s plane, talking to people you’ve seen only in the news.  Imagine keeping their attention on your story as you talk.  Incredible.  But we would all give up the attention and all these experiences just to have our family member back.  In a heartbeat.  No one wants the kind of celebrity these families are experiencing now.  No one wants to joint that club.

But I digress.  Here’s something you can do.  Go to this website and vote.  It’s a poll asking people how they feel about increasing the size and/or weight of trucks.  Currently in most states the maximum weight is 80,000 pounds.  There is a push to increase that to 97,000 or 100,000 pounds.

One of the arguments most often used for increasing truck weight is that there will be fewer trucks on the road if they can be bigger.  Historically, there has never been a reduction in the number of trucks on the road when weights have been increased.  There are consistently over time more and more trucks sharing our roads.  If the weights go up there will be more and more heavier trucks sharing our roads.

Another argument is that the increased weight will come with an additional axle which will spread the higher weight out so  there will be less damage to our infrastructure.  Truthfully, a heavier truck is a heavier truck.  Our bridges were not built for 100,000 pound trucks.  No matter how many axles you put on the truck it will still weigh 100,000 pounds.  More damage to our roads and bridges is inevitable.

The families of Sandy Hook say they feel like their children and family members are with them as they work the Hill.  It’s true.  The people killed that December day are there on the Hill.  And that’s exactly why Sandy Hook families work on gun issues and our families work on truck issues – issues we didn’t know anything about not so long ago.  Issues we wish we didn’t know so much about now.

So please go and vote…and of course you can vote whichever way you feel.  At the beginning most of the votes seemed to be coming from the trucking industry.  Now there’s more of a mix in the comments.  You don’t even have to comment.  We were told we might have to set up a profile to vote, but I didn’t have to do that, so you will be anonymous.  We just want to know what every day people think about bigger heavier trucks on our roads.  We don’t want the poll to be skewed either way…we would just like to know how you feel.

Thanks as always for all your support.  As things progress you know I’ll keep you posted.


8 Comments

Guns and trucks

Listening to the news on the way home tonight I caught a snippet of someone, perhaps the governor of Connecticut, maybe someone else, talk about not backing away from an issue just because the other side talked longer or louder, about not giving up even though the task seems difficult, about standing by your convictions.  The news was covering the President’s stop in Connecticut campaigning for some measure of gun control but talk like that actually helped to bolster my flagging hopes about truck issues.

The next Sorrow to Strength conference is coming up.  During the first weekend in May many family members will be meeting again, talking again, learning again.  Crying again.  Before every conference I get wound up,  sad, angry, even tired.  And that’s before I even land at Regan National.  In some ways I look forward to going; I love Washington DC, but I also dread the conference because it exposes some of the old feelings and frustrations that we all felt right after Dad was killed by a tired trucker.

Lately I’ve been thinking that the whole thing is just too complicated for me to understand, certainly too big for me to make any difference.  Yes we won a huge victory last summer and some of what we’ve been working for has happened.  But so much more is needing to be done.  And the tentacles of the trucking industry are everywhere.  Even when we think we’ve won a small battle we have to stay vigilant to make sure it is not undone or negatively influenced by people that want to increase profits by moving goods in  larger and heavier trucks.

So hearing someone else supporting change that is difficult, change that is being fought by big money, change that is complicated – hearing someone talk about not giving up even in the face of great resistance helped me realize that my fight is worthwhile too.   Giving up would be wrong.  Giving up would let big money and big truck companies win.  Giving up would mean people will continue to die and be injured.  Of course continuing the fight doesn’t mean no one will ever be killed or injured…just that some people will be saved.  And isn’t even one person’s life worth the effort?

Yes, yes it is.