I am livid! And depressed. Oh man, I’m just all wound up because my mama cheated on me! Oh yes she did, and she can’t explain this one away either.
I looked up the definition of cheat, just to make sure I was accurate, and this is what the Urban Dictionary said: “Someone who is in a committed relationship and breaks the trust of his or her Katie-girl by getting physically or emotionally involved with another dog.”
OK, I edited the definition just a bit. But she still cheated.
What you say? You don’t think mama would ever do something like that? That she loves me with all her heart and I’m the most important dog in her whole world?
Well. I have proof.
Yesterday, at approximately 11 hundred hours a car drove up to our house. A nice lady (I remember her from visiting her farm last year) got out of the car and petted me and she smelled good and I liked her right away. (She’s a regular treat dispenser, ya know what I mean?)
I gave her a tour of my lake house and then she and mama went back outside and I wasn’t allowed to go with them. Huh! Something is up. But I didn’t see or hear anything so I waited expectantly. I figured I was due another treat.
Then mama came back inside and got her camera and I still didn’t get to go with her. That’s definitely a sign that something’s amiss. Usually I am the center of all her photography and if she’s not shooting beautiful me, then, I ask you, what is she taking pictures of?
But I heard the car drive away and my mama didn’t come back in the house, so I settled down to wait (not nap, people, wait!) by the door.
Eventually she came back and do you know what? She smelled like boy dogs! More than one boy dog! I think my mama is cheating on me with more than one dog! And these aren’t the harmless neighborhood dogs either! I know all their smells and she’s usually with me when they come around.
So…while she was sleeping last night I snuck on her laptop and found pictures! I have proof people! She went up the mountain without me (that part is just fine) and took the nice lady and her three boy dogs!
And then, the worst part is she brought them back to the house and they got to explore my back yard! And I didn’t even see them out there because I was waiting (not napping!) by the door on the other side of the house!
What do you think I should do? Should I kick my mama out of the house? Or should I go find a new mama and a new lake house with my own special bed and special dinner bowl and my own special food and treats and toys?
I need advice and I know you guys are just the ones to tell me what to do. You can comment here, but do it quick cause mama will be awake soon and you know she’s always on her computer. I don’t want her to find out she’s been caught.
Not yet anyway.
PS: Mama woke up. She says to go to this blog to read about the other point of view.