Change Is Hard

…but change is certain.

Letting go

43 Comments

I cleaned your nose prints off the windows yesterday.

I ran my fingers across the little bumps one last time and then spritzed them away.

Because I don’t need those little smudges to know you were here.

And that you’re still right here beside me.

Author: dawnkinster

I'm a long time banker having worked in banks since the age of 17. I took a break when I turned 50 and went back to school. I graduated right when the economy took a turn for the worst and after a year of library work found myself unemployed. I was lucky that my previous bank employer wanted me back. So here I am again, a long time banker. Change is hard.

43 thoughts on “Letting go

  1. hugs to you… she is always there….

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  2. Smudges may be gone, but love remains.

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  3. Yes, she will always be with you.

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  4. I feel this so much

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  5. Katie is always by your side. 💕🐾

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  6. Sending warm hugs your way. The love will always remain even when the smudges are long gone.

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  7. Oh, Dawn…😥 That Katie-girl smile and those little feet…❤

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  8. Oh, gee, my eyes are leaking again. I remember when I had to scrub away the greasy spots from where Dallas dragged up along the wall and hung out on the A/C registers. You feel like you’re erasing them. But not to worry — they’ll always be around in spirit. Sometimes I wonder if Monkey isn’t sensing Dallas’s presence, too (I mean, he was here for 13 years!) Hang in there and know we miss the Princess too!

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  9. A lot of us understand. Not that that helps you miss her any less.

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    • It does kind of help. Like if I share the grief there’s less weight on me. Plus, all those other people to keep her memory alive. It’s all good.

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      • Well, actually, yes. And I should know, because I’ve done and keep doing the same thing. Hugs!

        Liked by 1 person

        • In 2004 when both my parents died unexpectedly I felt sort of guilty sharing my intense grief with everyone else. But people asked how they could help, and listening to me talk about my folks and how they died, and the good times, and just in general made it so much better for me, though I often felt like it was unfair to burden them. It wasn’t their burden. But talking about it helped me, and they wanted so much to help me. I think in the end it was what was right for me and I’m so grateful so many people were willing to listen and cry with me. I have an army backing me up. You do too. Sending you hugs.

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  10. I know I didn’t vacuum for a time after giving Khyra her angel wings and silver harness –

    BUT you are so spot on – she’ll always be there with you –
    ALWAYS and FORVER – to quote some song lyrics

    H&K&W,
    Willow & Phyll

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    • I remember the first time I vacuumed after she left. The roll of sheltie fur under the sofa made me cry. The next time I vacuumed the lack of a roll of sheltie fur under the sofa made me cry.

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  11. I kept the last stick Cole brought to me on his last day. It broke when it rolled off my desk last month. I will glue it back together.

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  12. Yep, five years ago, I moved out of the house/yard that my girl Alex and I shared for 18 years. I still have the last stuffed toy that she tore to shreds! as she always loved to do with those dastardly things.
    Katie’s eye contact, her beauty, her love of you … never-ending.

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    • It will be hard to move from here whenever we do….so many memories from (so far) two dogs that lived with us here almost 30 years. Memories of Katie almost overshadow my memories of Bonnie. We didn’t have digital cameras during Bonnie’s reign so I have fewer pictures of her. She was a good dog. We’ve been blessed with three good shelties in our lives.

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  13. She’s a beaut. I saw your post yesterday on the way to school and looked over at my own windows and saw nose smudges. Thinking of you, sending you peace and love.

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  14. Aww, I know your pain, Dawn. Sooner than later, I will be doing these things when my little Aero crosses the bridge. Hugs!

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  15. Hugs. I’ve been thinking of Katie as we prepare for Walktober. I think she’s right there with you, too. ♥♥♥

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  16. It’s like every time I found another bit of fluff behind another piece of furniture. Loathe to sweep it away but knowing it’s not what remains that keeps them in our hearts. Hugs to you.

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  17. Oh my, that must’ve been tough.

    I never “fixed” the scrape marks Misty made on our TV stand…..it’s hard to let go.

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  18. Aw…I did the same thing. I just couldn’t do it for the longest time. I know how you’re feeling. 🤗🤗🤗

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    • Sure is hard. I don’t remember being like this when the previous sheltie died. We had her for almost 15 years…but I didn’t have to make the decision so I guess I felt like she left us when she was ready. And we got Katie 6 weeks later. Katie’s personality pretty much overshadowed all previous sheltie experiences. 🙂

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      • Aw, each dog touches our life in a unique way. I think you’re likely right, when the dog makes the decision on their own it seems to be a bit easier. Plus for Katie (like it was for me and Copper) they needed us for extra special TLC as they aged. I also think that during the pandemic the dogs made their presence even more important – they were there when we worried and comforted us. Katie was very special indeed – she’ll always be special to you and your heart will ache at times and skip beats of joy at times remembering how much you shared together. Hugs to you!

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